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Mom (86) lives alone and I got bites when I visited her. I have sprayed and done all I can. I live 600 miles away. She has Alzheimer’s and doesn’t believe she has a problem. The home health workers won’t come into the home till she has a certificate that the house is free of bugs. I can’t move her in to ALF either. The house is very cluttered. She really can’t afford an exterminator but there is not much choice. I spent a week with her and her memory is worse. I really don’t think she can live on her own much longer. How can I get someone in to spray when she doesn’t believe there is a problem? I can’t just go in and start throwing stuff away. I am the only one that can deal with it. My father and 2 brothers are gone. I need help to resolve all this.

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It doesn't seem like she can live alone now, let alone for much longer. Whatever you do don't let them send her home, which it sounds like they won't anyway. Now is the perfect time to move her directly to an AL or NH. What makes you say that is not an option?

If you don't have powers of attorney for her then you actually can't do anything at all, nobody except the state can. Find out what you can and can't actually accomplish and go from there.
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If and when your mom gets moved, EVERY SINGLE ITEM in her house has to be treated or thrown away.

Some things may be unsalvageable. Furniture, for instance.

When you visit, your personal items need to be put through the same scrutiny. You can bring the bedbugs home with you.

Yes. APS may need to be the place to begin.
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"I really don’t think she can live on her own much longer".

Rosetree, I say with kindness - please think about your thought above. Is it "much longer" or is it now? It's OK to take thinking time on this but first tread with caution through this crises stage. Below are my impressions of similar situations - but I am not there! Arm yourself with knowledge & facts.

* The ER will want to move her on
* The hospital will not want to admit without medical need
* Hospital will push for discharge
* Hospital will discharge unless strong reasons this is unsafe

May I ask what took Mom to the ER?
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Rosetree002 Oct 2021
Mom was discharged in a hospital gown, after 3 days. She was taken by ambulance to the hospital . While she was gone I cleaned ,washed .and sprayed everything in her room. I also vacuumed and steamed the sofa, chair and loveseat . I will call an exterminator on Monday. Social service called and no one will come in to the home to visit. She told the Dr in a follow up appointment that she was in a car accident in NE. She has started making up things when she can’t remember. I have started to document everything. I sent a note to the Dr . I will start looking for AL in the area I live in. One step at a time. First get someone to deal with the bedbugs.
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Your Mom can't go back to her home. Anyone suffering from Dementia should not be left alone 24/7. Tell the hospital you need to place her. If she has money, an AL, if not a nice NH with Medicaid paying. Tell them to release her would be an unsafe discharge. That cleaning up the infestation will not be an overnight thing.

The exterminator should be able to tell you what they can treat and what they can't. Anything upholstered will not be salvageable. Mattresses either. Get the house cleaned out, exterminated and sold. at Market Value.

Hate to say this, but if this has never been a problem before with Mom, one of the caretakers could have brought them in.
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Tell the social workers at the hospital that there is nothing YOU can do from 600 miles away.

They need to get Adult Protective Services involved and have your mom declared a ward of the state and taken into care.

Are your parents still married? If so, you should give the hospital dad's contact information.
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Cover99 Oct 2021
I think dad is deceased.
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Rose, contact the county health department.  I don't know if they would help, but it could be an option.   Or try the state Elder agency, or Elder Law division if the state has one.

I've never used this, but my county has a low interest house improvement project.   A neighbor used it to get some work done on a house she and her alcoholic/drug user son couldn't take care of.   

When she died, the loan was forgiven.  Apparently it doesn't remain an obligation once the owner dies.
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Rosetree002 Oct 2021
I will check into an Elder Law person. I have thought about that before. We will need to talk to someone before we can move her and selling her house.
Thanks
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Rosetree, thanks for updating. You have worked HARD! But it sounds like you have a good plan laid out now. Agree that bedbugs are priority 1!

All the best 🤗
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