Mom struggling with feeling useless. What are some ideas to help her?

Maybe it's too corny but now that the weather is nice, would she enjoy tending a little garden? A lot of the garden supply stores have boxes you can set up along the deck rail, or planters that are up higher so she could sit in a chair and work.

My grandpa loved watching the birds and squirrels. He had a friend in her 90s who would mix batches of seed cakes to put out for the birds each week. I wonder if an aide could help your mom with a project like that and place them so they're visible from a window your mom sits near, so she could see the animals enjoying her treat for them?

Does your mom knit or crochet? There is a group of ladies at our old church who knit little patches (just 2"x3") and they tie a little guardian angel prayer (printed on the computer) and charm on it and leave them in a basket near the Holy Water for people to take. They call them prayer quilts or something like that, but it is a sweet thing and the kids especially love them.

This is a tough stage. It really helps to have people around (or at phone's length) who can remind your mom that she is still the same special person she's always been. My sister typed up friends and family's phone numbers in big print so my grandparents could call and check on people. They enjoyed that.

I hope other people have some good ideas!

Could she make birthday calendars? My FIL loved to pick up calendars from banks and funeral homes ( he liked the landscapes and religious ones). He would transfer all his kids and grandkids birthdays and anniversaries onto them for himself and then he would make up spares to give family members. Of course we made a big deal over how handy they were. That's a good project for end or beginning of the year when fresh calendars are handy. We've thought about gluing photos of individuals to their birthday on the calendar but haven't done it.
Does your mom use the computer? What did she like to do when she was able to get around?
My aunt likes to shell pecans or walnuts. She likes to snap beans and shell peas. She's also good with chopping onions and celery, peeling eggs. Anything where she can sit. She loves fruit salad, egg salad, potato salad. I'll get her started and she'll chop away.... For about 10 min. She is also adamant about cutting her name and address off of all mail to thwart identify theft. Keeps her scissors handy. ( I doubt she remembers why she does it anymore). She likes to sit and visit with almost anyone. If I say I need to find a picture of Uncle Bobby she will go through all the albums looking for him. Of course she forgets who she is looking for and several different conversations will begin as she discusses the people in the album. Sometimes that doesn't work out. Straightening the flat wear drawer is good for a few minutes. Mostly she watches tv but she has her moments.

My mother loved to fold towels. When she saw me with a basket of them she'd say, "I suppose you want me to fold them," trying to sound like it was an imposition, but you could tell she was tickled. She also loved matching up socks. Even after she went to a nursing home I'd bring baskets of socks for her to match up. She felt useful! (And now that I have to match my own socks, I know she really was!)

I also tried to have her fold underwear but she couldn't figure out which were legs and waist. Any kind of small laundry items your mother could handle might be worth trying.

Sorting my costume jewelry by color and rearranging it neatly in its drawer also appealed to my mother.

Those are really good suggestions about helping with laundry and sorting.

If you like to cook, maybe you can cook together. Can she still use a knife? Maybe have her make the salad and cut up the cucumbers and tomatoes? If she can't do that, reading recipe books and picking out meals together could be both useful and fun. Perhaps your library has some large print cookbooks.

How about getting some travel brochures and books and having your mom help you plan your dream vacation? Tell her you want to give your husband a trip as a gift for his retirement or your Nth wedding anniversary. And if you do get to go on the trip, it will be extra special.

I just remembered that my mother loved shredding paper in our shredder. I doubt she remembered why, but she knew that I thought it was important. If I didn't have much in my actual "shred" bin, I'd add some junk mail.

Several times I brought a stack of cookbooks or the small recipe booklets sold at supermarket checkouts to the nursing home. All the ladies at my mother's table loved looking at them and would converse about what their mothers cooked and what they cooked for their children, etc.

I wonder if your mother would like to look through a recipe book or two with an assignment like, "Chicken breasts are on sale this week and so are mushrooms. See if you can find an interesting recipe that includes chicken breasts and mushrooms."

All of the above are very good suggestions. Can you give her a photo marker and have her identify the people in the pictures? Sorting of anything is good - coins, buttons. Have her test all the pens in the junk drawer and throw the dried up ones away. Clipping and sorting coupons? Load the dishwasher? I'll keep thinking.

All good suggestions everyone! My mom likes to write cards to send people, having been the faithful Christmas card one in our family...and still is. So, I always make sure she has a good supply of greeting cards & stationary on hand. Quite often I will find half completed letters everywhere. But, that's just fine. 😁

Pwberg, have Mom work on a "family tree". Maybe even sign up for Ancestry which has a store house of information. She could spend hours digging through the information. And this is a job that only Mom can do regarding previous generations. She may or may not recall names, but once a match is found it would jog her memory. Oh how I wished I had an interest in this back when my Mom was around and could see/hear, she could solve a lot of mysteries as to who was who.

I've been glued to Ancestry. Pulling out all the old photos and trying to identify who are these people. There are old U.S. census where not only family all lived together, but also lodgers, who may or may not have been relatives.

If she is social and doesn't mind typing on the computer, Goodreads has on-line book clubs for various interests.

Also have you seen those Little Free Libraries? It looks like something kind of fun ... your mom could curate her own little library. If it's something she might be interested in, they're at littlefreelibrary(dot)org and then click "Stewards" for more information on how to participate.

Thank you all for these great ideas! I'm going to put several in to use right away. Sometimes we're to close to see opportunities!
Again, I'm so grateful for your responses!