I am a retired widow and I had the same problem when my mom moved in with me nine months ago. My advice is to schedule some activities for yourself. I take a half hour piano lesson every week, have a book club every month and play cards with friends every Thursday. Of course I didn't introduce all these things at once, but now Mom knows I will be gone during certain times. When I am gone, I leave a simple job for Mom. She is able to prepare simple meals, so we plan what she will cook during the times I am gone. Hope this helps.
can relate to you very well. my mother never anted to be alone either nad I had my 1 freind sit with her if my soster was home she would stay with mom. you need to get someone to babysit or sit with her while your out. she'll be ok with someone else my mother adjusted to stayin with other people. I got so burn out i never got any breraks. if i did they were long iwas a worry wort its like a child. it got tothe point at the end i had to put her in nusring home she became to difficult was at teh end life stages of dementia. I lost mymom December 10 Imiss her dearly.. Try not to do what I did get so bunrt out in September Iwas getting sick from burn out. try to gether to go so she deosnt become too house bound. my mom nvere wanted togo out other than going to the Drs. I hope this wa helpful
SHe is using sickness to get attention. You have to differeniate what is real and what is not. If you see your mom everyday, then you know she is well. You have to continue your life and she will adjust. If you keep adhering to her, she will always do this and find ways to get you to be with her. If you can leave her, you just have to and if your situation is that she cant be left alone, you need to get someone to give you your time. YOur mental state will help you deal with the situation better. WE all need stress relief for our own health as well as caring for someone. Correct decisions are made made we are relieved of stress and constant the same routine
I have decided to create a calendar.. with time of day on it.. showing me at work..me getting ready for work..me eating..commuting everything..my laundry..then Mom time..put in errand time for my free time..I know mom won't remember the discussion when we review this..but if it is writing..and we have talked about it.. easier to just point to the time and move on hopefully avoiding the need to explain again.. put smiley faces on the MOM time.. so she will understand I look forward to that time and give as much as I can.
Can you bring someone in to babysit her while you're out? Did she ever have a church home, someone from there that can come and sit with her? Does she still have any friends that can sit and talk to her?
Hope this helps.