Hello all. My mdelom has dementia and is in a memory home. She is in an imaginary relationship with her activities director. I try to explain to her nicely that he is just a friend. She disagrees with me. She often gets jealous when he is working with another patient which usually ends with her crying. This is very hard.
If it upsets you to see your mom crying because the activity director is helping someone else. perhaps it best that you plan your visits at a different time of day when the director isn't around.
My Mom thought the Daycare bus driver was her boyfriend. She wanted me to call him. I told her I did not have his phone number. He was really nice to her. Came to the door to get her. Put her arm thru his and walked her to the bus. Same thing when he brought her home. He would ask her how her day was going and she would smile up at him.
I know there is nothing that I can do. It's just hard because I don't want her to get her feelings hurt. He knows and the nurses know. And it seems that he is telling my Mom that it is wonderful to have such a nice friend. When she mentions it to me I let her know that it is always a good thing to have friends and to be able to see each other all the time and do activities together ❤️ Your Mom sounds so sweet
I have spoken to the staff and this has happened with other patients too. Some have even claimed that they are in a relationship with him and are carrying his baby. They are used to it.
Her caregiver played Elvis movies on the TV nonstop because my mother loved the beautiful scenery, songs, and attractive young people. Her PT came to the house, and since he knew she loved Elvis movies, he'd sing those songs to her when he was working with her in order to distract her from the pain. Due to her dementia, she confused the PT with the TV Elvis.
She'd sit at the window and watch all day for Elvis's car to drive up. She was sure they'd get married when he got there. She even bought a ring! Her caregiver took her to the mall in her wheelchair for entertainment, and mom insisted on looking at the rings in the jewelry case in a store. Next thing we knew, it was on her finger. I asked her why she'd bought it. She said in total seriousness, "I think it's the only proper way."
That's what made her happy.