Mom has a UTI and is dehydrated, I feel guilty because I thought she had dementia. Advice?

Why do you feel terrible? You did exactly what you were supposed to do. You assessed your mom's symptoms and got her medical attention right away. A diagnosis was made and I'm assuming treatment was given. You did what a caregiver should do.

The symptoms of a UTI mimic those of dementia. How were you supposed to know that? But you knew your mom was sick and you sought medical care. I think your mom is in very good hands with you. You took care of her and got her seen by a Dr. There is nothing to feel guilty about. You did good!

UTI's are fairly common in the elderly and now you know what to look for in case it happens again. Your mom is lucky to have you.

I think Katie really hit on something. Since the elderly are prone to certain infections - why wouldn't a hospital, nursing home etc. test for these first? Money, plain and simple. I think this forum has helped me so much when I have questions. I feel so lost but then so many help me gain my sanity again. We learn from each other. Cheers to all, we are stronger together.

I have learned after spending the night in the ER thinking my dad had a stroke or something, the signs of an UTI. They are very common in the elderly and I now keep a urine sample cup at his home and whenever I suspect a problem, I can drop it off at the doctors. My dad slows, down, becomes confused and sometimes is flushed but without a fever. The one to be angry at is the doctors because they often put this test off as a last ditch instead it should be the first thing as it is a really easy test. By the way, the ER visit was $7000. What a crock of ------.

The exchange of information,experiences, and opinions on this site are often more valuable than a costly visit to a doctor. This being said, doesn't mean you should forego an office visit. Oftentimes, trying a a simple remedy is all that is needed. However, if an office visit is warrented for your elderly parent, then it is certainly helpful to be armed with informed questions. Our roles as sons and daughters of our parents now include being their health advocate, it is a role which is ever expanding .

I agree as well. We do so much but can't expect to know everything. We should be able to rely on the experts but you can't. We all must become as educated as we can. I think the key is knowing the person and what just doesn't seem right. Just like you did. No need to feel guilty. As the others said, you recognized you needed to take control of the situation and you did, and now know more than you did before. That's all you can expect.

Guys, you have no idea how grateful I am to this site. There are so many things I didn't know and it looks like I'm entering the eldercare phase with my parents.

Okay, last plug for cranberry juice here (I promise I don't work for a cranberry juice company). Here's a study from 2010 documenting how it could be that the juice prevents UTIs from becoming worse. Apparently it doesn't kill the bacteria, just makes the urinary tract an inhospitable environment for it to grow & multiply. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3133681/

Do you know for sure that the UTI is completely to blame? UTI can and do cause horrible "dementia like" symptoms!! Many a person has had UTIs and mistakenly diagnosed. BUT, on the other hand... It is possible (without knowing the time frames on this, I am guessing this wasn't an over night thing, since she lost a considerable amount of weight?) that she has dementia and THEN suffered a UTI. It can go either way. Don't get a head of yourself. Make sure that she has NO signs of dementia after a full round of antibiotics. Don't rush to make a ruling. I know my mom, she had dementia, then she got a UTI. WOW! She really went over the edge. She got "better" after the Antibiotic. But not CURED. She still had dementia. Just not as bad as it was with the UTI.

I know when I worked at the Nursing home (for many years as a charge nurse) it got to the point when someone suddenly had a change in mental status, we would first run a UA to rule out UTI. BUT, if the Dr isn't used to working with Geriatric, they don't always think along those lines. If you have a General Practitioner it might be a good idea to find someone who specializes in Geriatrics! I switched my parents to a ARNP (Nurse Practitioner) who studied IN DEPTH geriatrics. I had the advantage of knowing her skills by working in the Nursing home, but you can do some homework and find someone who knows the issues your mom is facing. Geriatrics is a special field, much different from their needs even just a few years ago.

Hope this helps. Keep an open mind.

After reading the comments about Cranberry Juice... I abhor cranberry juice, and cranberries in general. I am sure I am not alone. My mom had a hard time drinking enough to be medicinal, so we got her cranberry CAPSULES. They are an awesome thing!! We just started giving them to her daily with her other pills. She NEVER had another UTI (2 years?) after that. We also have a dog that the vet prescribed them for her! They did the trick. Just throwing that out there as an option for people who can't tolerate the flavor and tartness of Cranberry! I also do not work for the cranberry pill peoples!! :p

It was a UTi that ended up with my Mom in a nursing home. In summary I had taken my mom to her doctor last year worried she may have dementia. He immediately gave her a cup to collect a urine sample. My mom stuck it somewhere and forgot about it. Three weeks later my mom was in the hospital with sepsis due to a severe kidney infection.After a prolonged stint in hospital, then rehab she is now in a nursing home. If she had just given the urine sample as requested who knows where she would be now.

Moral of the story if you suspect beginnings of dementia with a loved one or even yourself, get checked for a UTI first!