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My mother is 73. She has dementia, not severe, but it's there, and is changing her daily behavors. I recently change her from regular underwear to the pull up disposable underwear for women, for about 3 weeks now. Everyday, many times a day, she keeps asking me for her underwear. The reason she has to wear this new disposable underwear is because when she was wearing the regular one, she keep changing it a few times a day. I observed her and found out why she did that: she did not clean herself throughly after each bathroom visit (she has pee stain or even dirty from #2) so she changed and washed the dirty underwears (at least 3 per day). I did tell her that the kind of underwear you're wearing now is good from bath to bath (change it when you take a shower daily - she still goes to the bathroom herself and normal, I now also make sure she is cleaned) so there's no need to change it few times a day.
I do not want to ignore her or give her a cold answer "no, we dont have it!" because it will make her feel ignored. But at the same time what else can I reply to her to make her feel better? I can't explain things to her because she won't get it anymore. I feel so sad for my mom.

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If you now help her in the bathroom to ensure that she is clean why can't she wear regular underwear? Or is there incontinence?
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Elderlycare2020 Oct 2020
The reason I change her to this disposable underwear because I find out there were days she had leak and wet her underwear and pants, she keep changing and washing those underwear. It's a sign that she need to wear this before she wet her bed.
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My Mom wore them for slight incontinence she had since her 30s. She wore a pad for years. She was put in pull ups during a rehab stay and loved them. Be glad Mom will wear them. Get rid of her old underwear.
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Elderlycare2020 Oct 2020
Yes, I throw away the old underwear; Thank You
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“You don’t need your old underwear anymore because you have these nice new ones. I knew you’d love them and they’re so much more comfortable for you than the other ones”.
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Elderlycare2020 Oct 2020
Thank You
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