She's in her mid 80's, stopped taking all of her meds about 6 weeks ago. She changes the story on why as it suits her. She wants to go home, wants to drive, wants to handle things her way. I tell her that isn't all up to me. We have to follow the recommendations from her doctors. That leads to her saying if she can't drive there will be TROUBLE. I do have POA and can arrange for care. She turns away home health on a regular basis. She's starting to lash out at a nice woman who drops in to help out during the week. I live an hour away and have been up every weekend to check on her and her house. I can't maintain that. Twice a month is all I can manage mentally and physically. I feel trapped in all of this. The eventual solution is clear. If she won't cooperate with home health and lashes out at those who are trying to help her, her time at home will be short.
I just recently realized that verbal abuse, physical abuse, neglecting to protect me from abuse, constant put downs, and only being treated well when she gets what she wants when she wants it are not symptoms of depression. And I'm her only functional kid. And I have POA. I know just from the abuse she's thrown at me already about driving and not having "strangers" in her home that I'm not able to take much more. How do I explain that to the people that are making decisions on her care?