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I worked my tail off trying to get her in assisted living.
Got her into a lovely place and everything was going well, then after I went home she snapped and said she is not staying there. The place is 60 miles from where she was living. I was packing all of the essentials from her apartment because she isn’t able to care for herself any more. She does not agree. She can’t clean her apartment and did not bathe. But she could drink beer all day, she is 86 and a great fall risk. At my wits end!
She asked me what game I am playing, She needs her money. I told her here small amount of funds go to her care then Medicaid kicks in and we have a small payment to make it work. Any suggestions? Thanks.

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I am with again. Tell her if she is not happy, then she can do what SHE needs to to move without your help. That means lining up another apartment, arranging to have her stuff packed up and moved.
Seems to me she needs 24/7 care and someone other than you needs to tell her that. Maybe her doctor or the nurse at the AL. Sit down and look her in the eye and tell her this is where she needs to be. The only other option would be a Nursing Home. Hit her pocketbook by saying that a NH would be 2x the cost.

They always worry about their money. When she's able to go on Medicaid, you do realize that her SS and any pension she receives will go to offset the cost of her care. All she will have is what is left after spend down and a small amount allowed out of her SS check. It my state is $50 but each state is different.
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She may not want to stay there but it is likely the best thing for her. If she really wants to leave and is capable, she can arrange to move herself wherever she wants. If you don't agree, you don't have to be a party to it.

Maybe after a period of time, she will adjust and tolerate or even like her new living arrangement.

Good luck!
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