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I am her and my 67 yr old disabled brothers caregiver. She got released she called a lawyer and filed a dvpo against me. I was removed from the home. Not allowed back in home till court date in two weeks. Unless I hire a lawyer there don't seem to be anything I can do. She controls all money. What can I do, who can I talk too?

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That's why I asked the question .. what happened? :)
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We're aware that this situation is a year old, right?
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Have you spoken with the police? A geriatric nurse told me if you want something done go to the police. That had been my experience as well. They will advise if they can't act.
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Cooter, so sorry - you gave it your best shot and, the other way you will get a call from someone is if something happens to HER. Glad for you being outta there but sad for brother... and genuinely do not understand why the videos were inadmissible. You can't go back if the law says you can't anyways...if you have any round about evidence that something is going bad, either a neighbor or someone in a health care office who sees him, then you can try another APS report. Hugs and prayers...
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A broken system.
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Oh my, what happened?
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I am no longer allowed at the house, If I go, just to see my brother, she will have me arrested on trespassing charges. I had cameras in the house, did the recordings for proof of neglect, but was NOT allowed to use them in court. Judge said they were here say. Where it stands now, the Only way I'll get to see my brother is if I get a call from the sheriffs that something happened to him. I told you her cruelty was bad. It's what it is and I'm not going back there ever again. Like I said, Adult Services and the sheriffs stated, unless something terrible happens, They will Not get involved. Don't you just love the way the system works?
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In your shoes I would work on getting your brother out, to a group living situation. It's one of your mom's many lies and distortions that he'd be worse off someplace else.
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BTW, ask the security experts at the store for the current recording laws in your state.

Since you are no longer a resident, there may be restrictions. Many jurisdictions, there is no law against video, only audio.

Be careful to follow the law in your area. If you don't, the material you gather could not only be unusable, it could also get you in trouble.
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Ok, the cats are out. You are out.

But now that the restraining order has been quashed, You certainly have removed your furniture, right?

And you can visit your brother?

After your stuff is out, go to a security store and get a wide angle, motion activated nanny cam.

You'll need to find an unobtrusive place to afix it where it won't be noticed or bothered.

Retrieve it and download it into your computer.

All you need is one of your mother's inappropriate incidents to prove your contention.
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Re brother getting smacked around - Nanny cam time, maybe?

My God, he'd likely do much better in a group home or assisted living - hope he can be rescued.
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The DMOP was thrown out due to insufficient evidence. Luckily the sheriff testified on my behalf that I Never threatened her or abused her. That's what kind of nastiness I was dealing with. My brother being disabiled has very limited speak due to lack of therapy on her part. So he has no say. She always threatens him anyway if he don't go along with what she says, she'll put him in a nursing home where he'll be treated worse, then laughs about it.
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I have two questions:

1) It's way past April 17th. What happened in court?

2) When the sheriff or APS goes to your mother's house, why doesn't your brother speak up?
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Already tried to have her committed, but she plays the Victim Roll very well. It's Everybody else, not her. Adult Services was called twice, they came out and told her she can't be abusive to my brother. They no sooner left and she smacked him in the head, and told him to keep his mouth shut. They said as long as she supplies his Basic needs, theirs nothing they can do. It's always my word against hers, she has lied so much. When Adult Services and the Sheriffs get the call that something happened, don't anyone be surprised, it's the way the system works here.
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I think I would try to get her committed...there are elderly facilities.
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Yay for the cats. No so hot for your brother. Don't break the law, but if you have anyone who can keep an eye on things and get back to you, be ready to call Adult Protective services again for his sake, if you have any credible evidence his care is not good.
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This women is plain Evil, vindictive, bitter, hateful and hurtful. There is NO reseasoning. I got the cats, she left them out, I got them in the middle of the night. I AM the Bigger person by Leaving before it got worse than it already was. Social services and lawyer already said there is Nothing I can do about my brother. She holds the purse strings. Yes, he's gonna suffer, but THAT is what she chose to do. I'm NOT going to get arrested for her cruelty.
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Sounds like a very sad mess if she feels comfortable retuning the cats via your friend let them get them don't make a bad thing worst as for your brother go to your lawyer and social services tell them your stories as for her she may calm down and drop the charges if you stay away and agree to disagree let the lawyers talk about clearing the air your brother is in the worst spot as his care depends on her maybe she will on her own like she did with the cats arrange for you to take him as frankly at her age keeping care of her self is enough when she cools off she will be more agreeable and will feel bad she went off on you later some times laser get to get her and clear the air for both sides show love and kindness no matter how bad you feel be the bigger person and all will come out well when you do tit for tat it only pulling you down her case will more then likely be dropped for lack of everdence they just removed you becauseits her house and you did say you where moving so real no big deal your lalaser can get your stuff sorry you are having all this
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I already did, except for kitchen knives, she has them. If I had stayed and put up with her lies, I have NO doubt she would of tried to us them on me. Let the sheriffs and anyone else deal with her, I got out with my life. Evil is evil, it will come back and bite her. I'm Done!
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Cooter 76: If there are weapons in the house, advise the police to please remove them.
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Thsnks for that, V.
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BTW, I just figured out what "expate" is..."ExParte Petition for Involuntary Examination", aka Baker Act in FL .
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Glad you are going to get the cats out of there via your partner, if I understood correctly. The order of protection against you is a one way street. You and you alone are not allowed to be around her until it is contested successfully, and you should be able to do that. It is a good thing you are lawyering up. Sometimes, even often, DCFS does the right thing, but it sounds like in this case some key players don't get it...especially the sheriff, and her lawyer who obviously either believes her or just wants her money. The DCF failure to protect your brother from being slapped around is inexcusable - they need to get him out of there. And it is not a matter of her going to jail, but of APS (adult protective services, that's probably what you meant) getting him decent care and stepping in to take over guardianship once she is clearly a danger to herself or others again. You need the court date which should clear you of wrongdoing, and you probably need to speak with a supervisor at APS.
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Cooter, things are things. What you have now is the clear knowledge that your mother is mentally ill and that nothing you can do will change it. Without you to blame, her inability to care for herself and your brother will become clear and your brother will be removed. You can visit him. Don't look back at the rest of the mess.

If you find yourself living in a place where no pets are allowed, find a shelter to volunteer at or get a part time job there. Take care of yourself.
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I believe we all know that hindsight is 20/20. That being said, I recommend a recording device to use, if you have any communications with your mother, her attorney, just about anyone. Go ahead & let them know that you are recording them and then record. And your mother sounds like she will just get mad and yell at you to just go ahead and record. That could be very useful. I'm sorry, that that's about all the helpful hints that I have for that part of the situation
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There are several cat rescue groups in Florida. If you are in the Central Florida area, I recommend pet rescue by Judy. In Florida, the Human Society is not 'no kill'. No matter which rescue group you reach, please be certain to explain that you only want your cats fostered. If they do not have any foster parents available, keep searching.
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What is a Baker Act. If u don't have medical POA can't get results anyway. Hey, a NH for ur brother couldn't be any worse than living w Mom.
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She went off the wall screaming and physically attacking me, had to call sheriffs, told to expate her thru a judge, she was taken to a mental health facility, they kept her for 72 hrs for evaluation. Of course she played the victim. In fl, thats what they refer to as the Baker Act. She then filed a Domestic Violence order on me, which is a crimminal charge by a lawyer and judge. This was her revenge.
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Are your pets still alive I hope? If you are out and on your own, I would go as far away as possible and start over. It is not easy, I have done it. I lived in a tent for a while because i did not make enough to afford even a broom closet. My food allowance for one week (1984 - 85) was around $12.00. You don't have to forgive her, however, in accordance with faith, just turn her over to a higher power. He tends to have a bigger hammer than we do. The real hurt is why can't mom love me? Face it: all she was ever interested in was herself: I recommend looking up a forum for narcissist survivors. You may well find more answers there. Go to social services and see if they can help you. Church SHOULD help you, if they follow their beliefs.
Just remember: paybacks are hell. May not come in this lifetime but it will come. Hang in there.
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What is "baker actor"?
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