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I’m running out of ideas/options to make mom, for dinner. I’m spending too much time each day on the web (time I don’t have) searching for different recipes, only to find that I’m getting overwhelmed and frustrated, and no where further with ideas. It’s obvious that I’m burnout but until help arrives, I may have another month or two of this (it’s already been close to a year).


Does anyone use an app or website to plan out their week/monthly meals? The ones I’ve found are too “healthy” for mom. She’d never eat 3/4 of the suggested meals. She’s picky. Meat and potatoes kind of girl. Nothing fancy. No quinoa or kale here lol Just simple. Thanks in advance!

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Someone may have suggested this but consider the menus of the places your mom liked to eat out.
Your version of lasagna may not be the same but it would be something to try. What places did she frequent? Mexican, seafood, Chinese, fast food, Italian, steak house? Make it simple. Visit with her about what she liked at the restaurant. Maybe it was the Mac and cheese. Maybe it was the dinner rolls. Maybe it was getting dressed up to go out. You could have one night a week be restaurant night at home for fun if you have time and interest.
You are sweet to be catering to her. I hope she appreciates you.
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I printed a copy of a weekly menu from an assisted care facility. I figured they had more experience in what elders eat. Because my mom doesn't like to wear her dentures I really can't serve her meat unless its broken down like burger or slow cooked meats. She also started hating veggies (toddler tendencies anyone?). Another thing I tried was letting her chose the shopping for the week by giving her a grocery store flyer. I ended up with a huge amount of food to store and she was still sticking her nose up. Bottom line...she just wants lighter meals. She sits in a chair all day and is not burning calories. Breakfast is the biggest meal of the day so I sneak greens into her omelette and serve some breakfast meats. By suppertime its just yogurt and a bran muffin. I don't like making separate meals for everyone (me, mother, husband). That is want takes up so much time! So I recently ordered some pre-made dinner type meals that will be frozen. It's similar to the meals on wheels program but you pay for it. I'm hoping this gives me a break a few days a week. I can already hear her saying..."that's too much to eat", so I will try to do smaller plate and smaller portion.
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NeedHelpWithMom Oct 2020
My mom eats very little so she prefers smaller potions too.

I’m the same way. I will lose my appetite if I see a giant mound of food on a plate.

You’re smart not to serve a ton of food at once.
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Think of it this way.
1. 1 protein
2. 1 starch
3. 1 veg

Make a list of the things she will eat in each category (rice, mashed potatos, peas, string beans, carrots, chicken thighs, strip steak, salmon, turkey burgers etc.

Write these out on index cards in 3 piles. Pick one from each pile and cook!
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Lov3Lif3 Oct 2020
This is a good idea! Sadly she doesn't eat vegetables but this is still a great and creative idea. Not only is it useful, she can participate and help in the process. Thanks!
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I also make what's called an Impossible Pie with Bisquick, and it's the best way in the world to use leftovers. You can use the base recipe of 2 eggs, 1 c. milk, and 1/2 c. of Bisquick and throw anything else in there you have on hand. A half-hour in the oven at 400° and you're good to go. It's a decent meal, gives you plenty of leftovers, and you can put vegetables in it, meat, cheese -- whatever strikes you that day. That was my go-to to feed my picky kids when they were growing up, and frankly, older people are a lot like little kids. They'd happily eat anything they like every day if given the opportunity.
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Isthisrealyreal Oct 2020
I make this as a hamburger meal and it is always a hit, whether I make a regular cheeseburger, a pattimelt, green chili burger or whatever I have needing used. A side of lettuce and tomato rounds out a nutritious meal.

I just saw where you say she won't eat hamburger unless just a burger, try different things and if nothing else dad will enjoy the frozen leftovers.

Check out everydaycheapskate.com for a homemade bisquick recipe if you don't have any on hand.
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Soup and Sandwiches weather. Try grilled cheese and tomato soup.
Fruit (even canned pears/peaches) over cottage cheese, on a slice of romaine lettuce.
Have on hand jello cups and applesauce cups.
Tuna & Noodle Casserole.
Can of salmon (or sardines) over crackers.
Can of Chili over baked potato.
Hard boiled eggs prepared ahead, 3 days worth.
Cinnamon/raisin toast with apple butter. (Strawberry preserves).
Microwave quiche appetizer servings.
Avocado on toast.
Spaghetti

I would say hot dogs with cottage cheese, but unless Knockwurst, very bad for you.
Ice cream in individual cup servings.
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earlybird Oct 2020
I am getting hungry, Sendhelp. The meals and snacks sound so good. I might just make a few of them next week.
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Your mom doesn’t like vegetables...I don’t either unless they’re raw. I have been a selective eater since childhood and I’m now 71. I love a spinach salad with shredded carrots, chunks of cauliflower, etc. it’s the odor of cooked vegetables (except potatoes) that I find nauseating. My ear, nose, throat doctor believes selective eaters are actually hypersensitive to textures, odors, etc. Similar to having an allergy. As we age, our taste buds change as well.

if your mom isn’t diabetic, will she eat applesauce? Keep a jar in the fridge, always have peanut butter handy, cottage cheese, cereal, eggs, milk, cream, shredded cheese, cheese sticks, bread, rolls. Suppertime for seniors can be as easy as scrambled eggs with cheese, toast and bacon. And selective eaters will often stick to the same things (with little variety) and be perfectly happy.
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DWinHull Oct 2020
Thanks for this perspective. In my ongoing search to feed my mom I realize I just need to make it simple. Stick with the basic foods she likes --- all the ones you have listed above except raw veg. Cooking homemade applesauce with apples from our outing to an orchard has been a huge favorite. No sugar added for the diabetic -- still very delicious with a touch of cinnamon.
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Scrambled eggs....adding everything possible, top with cheese:

Potatoes
Shredded zucchini
Spinach
Mushrooms
Ground beef or sausage
Bacon bits (from real)
Chopped up Canadian bacon
Chopped bell peppers, yellow, orange, red
Broccoli snipping the tiny tops small, into a seasoning
Parsely and Cilantro, green onions,
Sour cream, or thick plain Greek yogurt, stir in at last minute

Supplement a few meals with a fruit and ice cream and yogurt smoothie.
Add blueberries.
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Here's one recipe that I use from this forum:

"I cook grass fed ground beef, add onion, garlic, spinach and maybe another green veg, tomato, mushrooms, sometimes black beans, salt, pepper, Parmesan cheese and add cooked pasta or can do rice. Place in meal size containers and helpers for Dad only have to heat up one item. Can make with chicken too. I call an all inclusive meal."

I don't know who posted it in the first place, but it's brilliant and works very well. It's fairly simple and can be easily modified according to tastes. I usually double the recipe so I can serve some today, portion some for the next day, and freeze one entire batch. The frozen batch can be thawed overnight and put in the crock pot. Just make the pasta/rice fresh each time. In fact, my group has passed on the rice altogether and it's fine without it.

I have never used an app for cooking/planning. By the time I figured out how to use it, we would all be VERY hungry. I write my menu ideas on the back of my shopping list and it all seems to work.

Like earlybird said, I pick 4-5 meals for the week - I really don't plan a full 7 days. I know there will be leftovers in between and/or a night where we might just want cereal or something.
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Lov3Lif3 Oct 2020
This sounds great for me ; ) Mom has to have something different every night or she'll turn her nose up to it. You'll pray for me when I tell you she doesn't eat beans, not a fan of ground beef, unless it's a hamburger and it can only be fresh ground beef lol and she said she never wants to see chicken again after the rehab facilities (though if breaded I've been able to sneak it in). ☺️
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Don't count on frozen peas. I'm 80. Won't eat them! ("petit pois", canned, yes!). I'm not the only one, and I live in a retirement community that furnishes meals. But Orzo? Quinoa? No. Stick with the familiar.
Much of taste is regional. Depends a lot on where a person grew up. Northeast? South? Southwest? Ask her what her mother used to fix and look for recipes, the simpler, the better.
We ALL boycott kale, arugula and "mixed" greens with unidentified "stick-like" things! Don't know anybody who doesn't like mashed potatoes and gravy, though! (Preference for "white" or "brown"varies). You can use salt substitute or Ms.Dash.
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MargaretMcKen Oct 2020
I agree that it mostly depends on where you grew up, often on what you got as a child. However I have never before met anyone who couldn't meet the challenge of frozen peas - you've got me there! My daughter eats all the kale-type things, I won't touch them. My grandson eats them too, poor little thing. I reckon it's child abuse.
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The simplest way to do this is to just cook extras for your own meals and pack them up for her - do you eat a drastically different diet from your mother?

I've just checked your profile and see that you are living with your parents. Might I ask why are you devoting so much time to meal planning? If there are special dietary requirements (diabetes, CKD, coumadin)? They obviously fed themselves before you arrived so I would concentrate on making the kind of meals they always made, tweaked for dietary if necessary.
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Lov3Lif3 Oct 2020
I lived independently for 17 years prior to my move home to care for mom. Unfortunately I eat very different from her, to which why I'm struggling. Before my mother got sick, they used to dine out for every meal. She's now nonambulatory, so life has changed a lot.
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