How do I get Mom the care she needs?

I would try a geriatric specialist who might be more understanding of her pain given her age. She should not have to suffer like this. I hope that you are able to get her the pin relief that she needs.

Opiate issue is just like the gun issue, it's not the thing ( gun, opiates, _______ fill in the blank) it's the law breakers. I have lived on pain meds for the past 20 + years due to 3 failed back surgeries. At the beginning of this year, my meds were cut by 30% over a 2 month period. I have never had a negative(bad) urine test (every month for the past 5 years, every quarter for about 5 years before that and random the first 10) I have never ran out of my meds and called the Dr begging for more, I've never lost or had my meds stolen.

I am not one of the "problem" patients. But because of them I am being punished. No laws or rules are going to stop the criminals. But the laws will damage many good productive people. I have been the primary caretaker for my wife for the past 13 years until her 4th stroke Nov 2017 when I had to send her to a SNF, I still visit her every day. I've missed 6 days since last Nov. I would not be able to do this with the help of my pain meds, even reduced as low as the pain specialist dares go.

Maybe you could get her on hospice for palliative care? They would keep her comfortable-provide a comfort pack of meds (usually morphine for pain). Hospice isn’t just for those who are nearing the end of life.

I work with a lady who has arthritis and chronic back and neck pain as well as some anxiety and depression. She wants to get off the pain meds and has started using Hemp oil aka CBD oil. She has had almost immediate relief and cut back tremendously on the pain meds. The brand is Charlottes Web (or Webb) and you will need to do a little research on dosing. The pain clinic was all for it. Please look into it. This Hemp oil has zero or trace amounts of THC so it will not cause a “high”.
If my Mom was still with us I would use it for her pain from Lung Ca., dementia and anxiety for sure.
best of luck to you and prayers for your Mom

Besides the previous suggestion which I think is a good one is there not one of the many doctors you can explain to how dire the situation is. Can you promise to manage the amount she takes? I don't see the point of doing this to an elderly person in the final stages of life. I would hope one of them could be sympathetic if it's explained to them clearly although I also agree with finding one who solely deals with the elderly. May I ask what state you are in?

I hate to hear people are suffering like this. Pain can be absolutely debilitating .
Has anyone mentioned working with a Holistic Doctor? Things like acupuncture. Also Mindfulness therapy, learning how to Breathe through the pain. This one sounds a bit strange but it's similar to childbirth breathing.

Some other thoughts
Can she go to a pain clinic to get daily injections
If she was in assisted living she would most likely get the pain meds she needs.
Will medicare send someone to the home and give her shots
Elder Abuse Law - Look into this because I think it would fall under it. Start with Department of Social Services. They will lead you to the correct attorney.
If the clinic is refusing to give the pain meds, change Clinics, Doctors etc.

I've offered to do everything to the doctors, I've sent so many messages to them, gone to appts, asked questions, I brought research done by their hospital to the appts that say opioids are the treatment for her conditions. They have laser focus on taking everyone off their meds or to a very small dose. A geriatric specialist is a good idea, though, I haven't thought of that.

Please also look into using CBD oil to help ease the pain (marijuana). It can be provided in gel pill form or also oil which can be administered topically or by mouth. I've had several friends with severe arthritis, who had been carefully using opiods to control the pain - no abuse or over use. When they started using CBD oil, they found their pain was better controlled and the cut back on opiods from their doctors didn't cause a problem with pain control. If this is an available option in your state, I would give ti a try. Just insure there is no, or barely a trace of THC - it's the THC that causes a marijuana "high". Best of luck.

If she can't get the continued prescriptions, I'd explore what is available to her. I might consult with a psychiatrist to address her depression. There are daily meds for depression that also treat pain, like Cymbalta. That med helped my LO who was disabled due to arthritis, when she got dementia. I might also explore other meds for arthritis. Another cousin, on the other side of my family suffers with severe arthritis too. She takes weekly injections. I'm not sure of the details. She says the injections help a lot. They are not for pain, but, actually treating the condition. They are quite expensive, but, for some, covered by insurance.

I have yet another family member who has a very serious spine condition in which the pain is constant and indescribable. She has metal rods in her back and needs another surgery. Doctors are weaning her off the pain meds. She is very scared and opposed to this, but, they haven't given her much choice.

Last week I saw a story about the doctors who were sent to prison for many years for over prescribing pain meds. So, I think that would get my attention, if I was a doctor.

My primary doctor's office has a sign that says that do NOT prescribe any narcotic pain pills.

I hope you can find some help. For a senior in pain.....I wish there was help. I'd seek a Hospice consult.

Not sure if this hasn't been suggested but try Hospice. The critera changed a few years back and Mom may qualify. They have to keep Mom pain free.