Is it legal to put POA on account when Mom is not incapacitated?

Yes, anyone can assign POA at any time for any reason. It may not be wise, but it is legal.

And if they have POA, they can change whatever they like, sell assets, buy property, etc, and there is absolutely nothing anyone else can do about that. And they can pay themselves whatever they like, too, and it's extremely difficult and costly to prove financial malfeasance.

Pam is right on, again. Except that in my family, the gender roles are switched; the sister controls the money and should also be overseeing mom's care, but it got dumped on me, and since I live with mom, it's been nearly impossible to get anything done properly, it's made my job a nightmare, and it will make your a nightmare, too. This sort of shared custodial agreement situation only works well in families that have strong, healthy relationships. Chances are you will never feel like things are being done the way you want them to be, and you will have absolutely no say in any of it. But you will be doing all the work, living with the stress and all the consequences of caregiving. Take care of yourself first. You'll hear this over and over again, it's extremely hard to do that, because mom's needs will always be front and center in your head.

I don't believe that is a legal move with your mom not being declared incompetent to handle her affairs in a business like manner. Even when she is declared incompetent, they are legally only to use the money in the trust account for your mother's care and not for their own benefit.

Have you seen the actual wording of the durable poa? Very often they are registered with the country register of deeds and can be seen at the register of deeds office or online for that particular county.

I wish you well. Let us know how this all turns out.

Check the POA document to see what "triggers" it. It is usually the statement by 2 physicians that the person is incapacitated, but not necessarily. You don't have to be incapacitated to assign POA to someone else, but it's the most common (and only really sensible) reason to have one.

Eilzabeth, there is a social stereotype that is still present in society that the daughters do the caring while the sons manage the money.

It would be good as thezookeeprer pointed out to see what the POA document says about activating the POA. Also, you need to find out if your state requires the document to be registered with the registry of deeds to be considered activated. My state, North Carolina, has such a requirement which my step-brother did not know about until he tried to use his dad's POA document. The banks wanted to see a registered copy of the POA which means it has a special stamp that is different for the notary.

If your mother has not been declared incompetent yet, then she can legally change that durable POA over to you if she want to.

Is she aware of your bothers' "eagerness" (greed) to get their hands on your mother's trust? Do they not understand that the trust still belongs to your mother and can only be used for her?

Are they doing her tax returns? If so, are they signing their names with POA after it? Have they gotten the code provided by the IRS for a POA to use when signing a tax return for someone that is written on the tax return each time one is filed?

Unfortunately, if your mother has been declared incompetent then she can't sign a new POA.

Sounds like it was a poor choice to give the brothers Durable POA?

Are your mother's monthly an/or quarterly financial statement still coming in the mail to your mother? At some point the brothers may use their POA to have those statements sent to them instead of to her by assigning their address as hers so that it is sent in her name, but to their house.

Does your mother and you have online access to her financial resources? That would be great to get before her minds gets too bad.

As an only child, sometimes I am glad to be an only child when I read stories like this. There is a lot of sibling warfare out there and it is mainly over the money either while the parent is being cared for or after they die.

Since you went with your mother to have the POAs prepared, then I see no reason why you can't go back to the same lawyer and ask him your question about their actions.

I hope that you can get all of this resolved soon. Keep us posted.

Let us know what you find out so that others can be helped by what you learn.

Your brothers being out of state is a good reason to ask your mother for practical reasons would she make you the durable POA. You are doing the caring. It makes sense that since you are right there that you should be managing the money.

Good luck!

I have access to all of her financial documents. I know more about it than anyone in the family. I don't think the POA can go into effect here in, NC, like Pam said until it is registered. However, I am still perplexed as why POA with their names on it would have appeared on a legal document. I will call the attorney on Monday. I can't waste any time since my mother is going down hill fast. I will let you know outcome, and again, thank you to everyone who has helped me with this topic.

Sincerely,

Elizabeth

I have seen the POA document. I went with my mother to have them prepared. They are not registered yet as Durable POA. I just don't understand how their names got put on the tax document as POA at this point. They are anxious to have their hands on her trust. I have been the full time caregiver and no more about her fiances than anyone. It doesn't make sense that I wasn't designated POA, but it is what it is. The male power is greater than the female care and love I suppose.

Thank you to everyone who takes the time to offer compassion and their thoughts with my delema of caring for my mother without being POA and my brothers in different states. I still don't know how their names got on her IRA account, but I intend to find out.

Elizabeth