Leaving for the weekend, lock the doors?

Your grandfather should be never left alone. Someone needs to be with him 24/7. Recently a w/c bound woman died in a fire in our town. Please find help and do not leave him alone. I can understand you need a break, but you need to be make sure your grandfather is taken care of and safe.

Does your grandfather have a medical alert bracelet or necklace to summon help in the event of an emergency? It concerns me that he is being left alone overnight. Does anyone have a key to get in? Are you able to afford the aides to stay longer, or is there a family member that can stay with him? Your need to get away is important, grandfather's safety is too. Ask yourself: will you be able to relax and enjoy the respite or will you question your arrangements for him?

Hktj: I did see your update of May 22. I am glad that you rethought your decision and will now have someone stay overnight with your LO.

I think everyone should have button-coded door handles. They hold 20 codes or so. You give each person a code (police/fire too) when the carer no longer needs the code, you delete it. Many people with pets do that too. No keys ever lost.

No one will be with him overnight? Oh, no! That is a bad decision.

I am very happy you made the choice to have someone stay with him at night. You probably also might have a plan to get him out of the house if there is a fire when you are home. I don't know where you live but even in town, it takes at least 3 minutes for help to arrive. Depending on where the fire starts three minutes is a long time.

If he is as bad as it sounds, someone should be camping out with him and sleeping in front of the front door with an alarm on the back door. I used that method for around less than a year and Mom still escaped twice standing in the snow knee deep waiting for the bus back to Ohio. It was then we decided to put her next door in the assisted living. Good luck. ( We NEVER left her alone, ever...)

Does your grandfather have an emergency alert system set up? That's number one...so if anything should happen he can push the button for help...secondly, contact your local fire department and see if they offer Knox boxes. This is a box that is installed with bolts to the house and has a locking mechanism with the only key in the hands of the fire dept...some cities loan or rent them out. Inside the box go all keys for getting in the house, so if the emergency button is used the fire dept can also respond. It may delay your get away until it can be taken care of, but you will feel more assured...

Like many others have said, you can’t go from 24/7 to someone just coming in to check on him. He needs a nighttime sitter there on site and someone to come in and see about him during the day for meals, meds and to ensure he stays hydrated. And you can purchase some indoor cameras to check on all that to give you peace of mind. Locking a wheelchair bound 91 year old in a house alone is asking for APS and the police to come after you, and with a vengeance.

The issue of medic alerts and boxes have been well covered, but I just want to add a comment on the latter. I checked Knox Boxes; they're much higher iin cost than smaller boxes which provide the same security. We bought ours at Lowes or HD (can't remember which) and my father (or maybe a friend - can't remember) installed it next to the door frame, and directly into the studs.

One thing not to do is buy a lock box with a handle, like the old gym locks. The handle can be sawed off; I tried it, and easily got a saw inbetween the two prongs of the lock.

Also, for a medical alert, I found the best source in our area to be a company that years ago began with total house security, and added medical security via a pendant later. Call several companies; if they just want to send a brochure, move on. You want one that responds and provides information over the phone, not by mail.

Consider which 3 choices of first notifications you want: first responders, you, or a neighbor or the caregivers.

Ask your local police dept about a Knox Box. You (or a friend or neighbor) can check on your dad by phone at a given time or times. If he does not respond, notify the police/fire dept to gain entry by using the Knox Box key.

The others have provided good answers:

Have a caregiver stay overnight in your absence. (easiest immediate solution)
Have a key-pad lockbox or Knox box place on your front door.

It is not safe for an elderly person in a wheelchair to be left totally alone. If he should fall out of the wheelchair accidently and find himself lying on the floor, he will not be able to get up to "summon help."

Meanwhile, I recommend getting him one of those necklaces whereby he can summon help. It should be worn at all times. However, this is assuming that he is "cognizant" enough to be able to know to push the button.

maybe Get one of the electronic locks you can use a traditional key and also be able to give different unlock codes to workers.
you will know when they enter and can change as needed. You can also just have them text when they arrive and Unlock. If needed you can also unlock for emergency if you aren’t there. Great for guests as well. I would look indoor valuables and invest in a camera to monitor. I would not use it all the time but when others are providing care or there when you aren’t. These have dropped in price and well worth peace of mind and investment. Some cable companies even can install. I would not leave my door unlocked.

You can't go from 24/7 care to day time only. Get one of the helpers to stay all night. He will be safe and you won't have to worry.

If you don't install some kind of key box that emergency people have access to, they will break windows or the door to get in. Not to mention, it might create problems for you as to why you left him alone. Not worth the worry.

https://www.knoxbox.com/

I have installed a Knox box in which all law enforcement can open to get my mother's house key out. It was installed right beside the front door and cannot be broken into. All local law enforcement have a master key to their box. They have come when she is alone and her medical alert button has gone off either by a fall or from her pushing the button on her necklace. We go through ADT security.

I am concerned that you think it is OK for your grandfather - who has round the clock care - to be left without help in the evening. Granted, he will most likely be sleeping, but consider the legal ramifications if there was a fall, a fire, a home health aide not showing up, or other emergency. May I suggest having a sitter for him in the evenings.

My father stayed alone in his house for a couple of years after his girlfriend went to assisted living. We were able to get him to agree to 4 hours Mon-Friday for help, the minimum from the agency. The local fire department accepted a key to the house (lots of elderly in the neighborhood did this.) we also made friends with some neighbors. If dad is cognizant he gets to decide. We don’t have to like it.
you can also call at certain times to check on him, and call the caregivers to see what they think.

Medic alert service detects falls so Medics will send responders and contact your trusted local relatives or neighbors for this emergency. Is this service your grandfather's option so you can have a much needed vacation?

To my knowledge a wheelchair bound elderly person can not be left alone in the house at all. of course it’s dangerous, he can’t help himself or get up and walk out if any fire, etc.

You need to hire a full time caregivers for the whole duration you are gone. That should give you peace of mind that he’s being cared for while you’re away.

Good luck and be careful!

If your trusting these aides to take care of your 91 year old father, I would think you'd try them to give them a key.

Let the Fire Department and Police Department know there is a "Disabled", Wheelchair bound resident in the home. Often they will place a lock box on the house that only First Responders can access this way they can get into the house.
Doing this if he has an emergency all he has to do is make the call to 911 and not two calls, one to 911 the other to someone that has a key.

Another option later on would be to replace the front door lock (if other locks are keyed the same you don't have to change those unless you want to) with a touch pad so a code can be put in. the caregivers can have the code as well as Police and Fire Departments. When a caregiver is no longer working for you rather than replacing the lock and having to give everyone new keys you can easily change the code. (remember to change all the locks when a caregiver is no longer working for you)

Leave a Key with a Reliable Neighbor.

Overnight caregiver does sound like the best solution, also consider adding door and window sensors that will alert to your phone.

HKTJ,
Putting this here so others may know you have solved the logistics of caring for your 91 y. o. grandfather. Good on you!


Hktj1711
14 hours ago
"Thank you. I didn’t even think. This is all new territory for me. I will ask the caregiver to stay overnight; I’m sure she will have no problem, we will just pay her more! "

😍

For next time, have him wear a call button that will let you and first responders know of a fall or other urgent need. And have a Knoxbox installed somewhere on the front of your home. My dad has one on the backside of his front porch post. It contains a housekey, and only first responders can open it, much better than having the door broken down to get help.

Some medical alerts have a locked box where you can put keys in to get into the house.

I'd be afraid to leave my 91 year old loved one alone over night or any time for the most part.  Can you get or pay anyone to stay with him over night?  And keep his routine?  Think of what could happen with him alone .. what if he fell? got sick? confused?  Just to many what ifs.  Like leaving a small child alone over night.

Do have a caregiver stay overnight.