I'm laying beside mom in ALF - she is actively dying.

My sympathies are with you. You are a great child and it's okay to be in denial. And it's totally understanding that you're staying with her. But you're accepting it whether you know it or not because you realize it can't go on forever. You are very fortunate to have her in such a nice ALF and that they're helping you through this time. I'm happy for you about that. But understand, your mom will be in a better place and not in any pain once she passes. And doctors don't always predict right - it could take longer. My heart goes out to you! (((HUGS)))

How lucky you are to have her in your arms. She is so blessed to be held, by the one who loves her most, at this time of pain and fear. You are both in my Prayers. May Peace wash over you both when she leaves.

I'm glad there are folks there to take care of you while you take care of your mom.

Thinking of you....

a relatively rapid death is the most any of us could hope for. the alternative is our greatest nightmare. wish both of you the best. sorry if that sounds brash, it isnt meant to be.

May the arms of angels surround you both, and may you find peace and solace in the shelter of their wings.

Bless you, dear one... May God give you and your Mom His peace, grace and love during this time... Your Mom is blessed to have you as a daughter...

Your mom is lucky to have such a loving, caring daughter. And I can tell she's been a great mom as evidenced by your love for her. I'll be thinking of you tonight and hoping your mom transitions in the most peaceful way possible. Big hugs to you.

Hang in there honey, what a heartbreaker. Big big hugs, please know that none of this is your fault, and you are a very good daughter. My heart goes out to you both.

She is very blessed to have you by her side. It doesn't feel like it now, but you will know later that you did the very best for her that could be done. You will appreciate that you were there for her as she left this world. I'm crying as I write this, I wish I could give you a hug. God bless you both.

Here4her - I'm glad your mom improved some. My mother-in-law did that too. They call this "the calm before the storm" in hospice. But it is helpful to us as they go through this. Her hearing and touch are the last to go, so understand, she's hearing every word you're saying to her. My in-laws were very dysfunctional too. I texted them that she was dying just because I didn't want any trouble about NOT calling them afterwards. They snuck up when I wasn't around and saw her. But I honestly can't tell you what's best - call or not call. I think if you and your attorney think they will cause problems with your mom's care or if it would be detrimental to your mental health - then don't call them. They haven't cared for 9 years - so why now? All mine wanted to know was when will they get their inheritance. You do what feels right to you - only you know that - and whatever you decide is okay. You've been a good daughter to your mom. ((HUGS))