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Seems as though you have this worked out for yourself. Everyone works out the best way for themselves. Everything is washable or disposeable except the mattress so that is the most important thing to protect with a water proof cover.
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I do the same thing as mom2mom, works pretty good. I also put a pair of boxers or shorts overtop of his overnight briefs because he will pull them to pieces (not fun to clean up that wet gel material) My husband seems to get the bed wet out the side of his overnight briefs. I make sure his "member" is tucked downward into the diaper but it has a mind of it's own :). Any suggestions?
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Thank goodness Mom doesn't have a "member with a mind of its own" to contend with.
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I have, from bottom to top:

Mattress
Waterproof mattress cover
quilted mattress cover
waterproof pad
fitted sheet
waterproof pad
depends
pantyliner

Sometimes we wake up clean and dry. Sometimes I only change the top pad. And, sometimes I have to dig down a couple of layers.
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I don't have the quilted mattress cover or the panty liner but I have 3 fitted sheets with absorbent pads in between each. Pads are absorbent on one side and waterproof on the other so liquid doesn't go through.

This way I usually only have to wash the top sheet and toss the disposable absorbent pad away. It never makes it through one layer.
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