Recently, all my Mom wants to do is lay around. Is this dementia progression or medical?

Moriah: That's right sunnygirl1, I (a woman, not a he) was responding to the original post that started this thread by Joycetavolacci. Thank you ,sunnygirl1!

Aging, sickness and death is terrible for all who are caretakers...and we will all have our turn. LIfe! yikes!

My mother is 92 and at later stages of dementia but I hear people jump around the stages. I guess, I would like to know how long this could go on and I hate not knowing. I guess, this frustrates me but I should be thankful she is mentally stable at this time. joyce

What bothers me is she was so different 3 yrs ago doing everything. I am just mourning for the person she was and sad for who she is now! I guess, this is all normal and sad at the same time. As I get older I realize this could be me...
They say with dementia when they stop eating this will probably be the end. Is this true? joyce

my mother was shuffling around the house a couple of years and needed help with stuff, but she could still walk. one night she some type of convulsion and was out for about five days...she could never walk again after that. of course, I could hold her up and walk her...so I did and still do that...to get to bathroom...to eat at the table. that was about two years ago...and since then...she's declined slowly, and by that I mean she started sleeping longer and longer during the day. She sleeps a lot now...but still has a great appetite when she wakes up. A doctor told me that once they start sleeping most of the day...the usually die within five years. but...know one really knows...everyone is different.

We all have a life cycle. Watch their eating and sleeping habits. If they start eating less and sleeping more may be at the end of their life cycle. Everyone is different. Start asking the PCP about the differences they will tell you and be more specific. Remember we were a;; born to die. We just don't know where, when or how it will happen. Have your business in order so when it's your turn you will not be a burden on those who love you. Be prepared!!

I am a retired banker and watched the turmoil of families who would come in without a clue of their loved ones wishes. It was not all elderly. Get a POA and healthcare directive prepared for yourself as soon as possible. Consult with an attorney.

We all love our mothers and fathers who are elderly. Start making them as comfortable as possible and leave the rest to the professionals and God.

Joyce, you are not alone wanting to know how long "this" will last. My mom 91, has been at her facility for almost 6 years but had really noticeable symptoms for probably 5 or 6 years before that. We noticed things for 5 years before that. But I would say the last 3 have been the hardest to see. It was her last fall and has been wheelchair bound ever since. There's just no telling how long she'll be with us. Very sad and very hard. Good luck and God Bless

I never heard of sleeping longer I heard if they just stop eating but of course if they sleep more their eating would probably decline. My mother also, is still eating well! Joyce

Same thing with my Father. He sleeps and eats. He eats more than a normal person eats. He is 90 but does not gain weight. We think he should weight a ton.

mizphylk
great response. I agree-do what we can and leave the rest to God and the professionals we trust to take care of them.

Sounds as if we are all going through similar issues with ageing parents. Most of us are also considered seniors. The best thing for us to do is try to take care of our self and give them as much love and comfort as we can. We pray we will make it to be their age. Life is a beach!!

I too have a mom who does this and at first it bothered me. I would try to encourage her to knit or read or watch tv. All the things she use to love to do. But she just can't concentrate and she forgot how to knit. I have finally accepted that having my once active mom just sit there on the couch staring into space or having her head resting in her hands is normal for her condition. It is sad and just....well...heartbreaking to see the change. I don't try to get her to do anything anymore. If she wants to sit there and just stare and ponder, then that is what she can do. At least I don't feel like I have to entertain her anymore.

love my beautiful once, very active mom...she too is just dwindling into a frail, vulnerable, childlike adult. I keep her clean, fed, and let her sleep...I feel blessed when she's sleeping...she always looks very peaceful. She really can't do anything anymore...so it is a blessing to me!

I have to laugh sometimes because I say to myself, what do I expect from this 92 year old women. She always tired but she does sit up and can actually, go to the bathroom by herself but of course we watch her. I should be blessed with this new neuro medication she is taking and everything is stable for now! She was delusional, angry and would take knifes and put them by her and she was very angry at my husband and I was afraid she may stab someone. It was so hard and by the grace of god things are fine for now! The medication she is taking now is neudexta its pretty new. Good Luck and Thanks for Sharing and and Listening Take Care Joyce

Sadly, our elders do turn child-like.

They turn child-like in a few ways. Their ego or id says that they are the ONLY ones that matter just like a toddler except they are on the other side of the bell-shaped-curve. In other words they never get un-self-centered but get more self-centered and never improve. If they have dementia they forget how to tie their own shoes and slowly forget everything else. My parents eat and watch TV and refuse to do anything. Mom is worse than Dad. Dad tries to pay the bills and drives to McDonald's or the local (very local) about 5minutes away and Shop-Rite. He is starting to get lost doing that. I have set up help for them about 4 different times but Dad drives them off. Then again the only one who will take the abuse is ME and stick around. Even the visiting nurse told me that if he was not nice to her she was not going to come back. So now I have to babysit him when she comes to see Mom. I am an only child and they are breaking (have broken) my heart. They are un-helpable. Is un-helpable a real word??

Joyce...Soooo happy for your mom and you that you found that medication!! Yikes... she must really been suffering...and of course, if she suffers, you suffer! Eventually seniors will just submit because they get to a point where they can't do anything for themselves. It's just a matter of time!

lifeexperiences,
well said. Words to live by .

I'm so relieved to have found this thread! My mom, 86, also has dementia, & I've been going nuts trying to get her to knit, which she used to love to do, or color in one of the beautiful coloring books she picked out. I'm finally realizing that I'm just stressing her out with it all, which is probably why she's been scratching all over, HARD, & picking her scabs. I've had her to the dermatologist, tried everything under the sun to help, but I've always had the feeling that it was me causing it. It doesn't help that my husband, who loves my mom dearly, is insistent that I get her up around 9 every morning (she & I are not morning people!), fix her breakfast (pancakes & an egg), do something with her during the day(I also work part-time), then take her for a walk around the block every night. I know his heart is in the right place, & we would both just lay around without his prodding, but I feel that at this point in her life, if she wants to lay in bed most of the day, she should be able to do that. He keeps telling her we're trying to help her get "better". I've started telling him she isn't going to get better --this is it, but I feel he & my brother are both in denial. I'm going to show them this thread, & hopefully it will help -- it's definitely helped me! I'm going to try to ease up on mom from now on.
Thank you everybody!