Is it worth it?

Sounds like she's getting by.

By your posting this here, there is no doubt in my mind that you have mom's best interests at heart. As many people will tell you AFTER spending thousands on hearing aids, they're not all they're cracked up to be. They take a lot of getting used to and many trips for adjustments.

Sounds like you've solved her problem just fine.

here4mom, my mother is 88. We went to an ENT not long ago. They did a hearing test on her and the doctor said that he hearing was what he would expect for an 88 yo person. He told her he didn't think a hearing aid would help much, if at all. So much of the loss of hearing when they get very old is neural, instead of conductive. Implants might help, but regular hearing aids most likely won't.

My father was almost completely deaf when he was 89. My mother wanted him to get a hearing aid. The doctor told him his deafness was neural, but said we could try an amplifying hearing aid. My mother was all for it, so we got a single hearing aid to see if it would help. I think it was about $1900 total for everything. He still couldn't hear anything... but we could hear the device squeal every time he turned his head to the metal lamp. What a terrible sound -- he couldn't even hear that!

If we had to do it over again I would have said no way are we going to get a hearing aid that won't help.

Try a speech and hearing person who does NOT sell hearing aids - we have some associated with the university - there are assistive listening devices that are not customized that may work just fine, and you may be able to get them on loan. There is an MD Hearing Aid company online with some good reviews too. You can also make sure she can see your lips and be ready to write down a word or two that she can't otherwise get. Always, always repeat what is not understood, don't leave her out of the loop - and usually just the part that is not understood, maybe in a different way rather than the part she might have gotten.

I'm getting to where I could not do without my hearing aids, but I have some coverage for them. SNHL (sensorineural) is often helped quite a bit by aids - that's kind of a myth I hear a lot, as if only conductive losses really benefit - but we may need to have a little more control over what frequencies are amplified than some off-the shelf devices can offer. A lot of true presbyacusis is not going to be as ticky about that sort of thing.

The hardest part is getting treated like I am stupid or not worth the effort to communicate with ("Oh, never mind, it wasn't important"), or having people whisper even after you tell them you are hard of hearing, rather than find a place to safely talk louder or just jot it down. YOU sound like you care and do a great job though! Thank you!!

PS - make sure her thyroid is OK - hypothyroidism can be associated with worsening hearing, as can decreased vitamin B levels and a few other things.

Thanks for your advice everyone! I think I'm "ok" with not getting her an hearing aid. I believe the Dr said her loss was neutral so I feel a little better about her hearing loss. I found an external speaker online It plugs into the tv, but it's wireless so the speaker can be very close to mom. She is VERY happy with it. I'm going to check with the mods to see if I can post a link. Also I'm learning to speak up, I've always spoke softly. Also I talk where she see my lips so thats making it better. Its funny, my hearing is far from perfect so most of our conversations begin with "what?" After reading what some of you have to endure I am very grateful mom is as well as she is. I have it easy compared to what others are dealing with. God Bless us all & thanks for the support!

I'd like to share 2 items I found that work helping with tv vision & hearing. I was amazed that items sold on the internet would be worthwhile.
The 1st item is a wireless speaker for the tv. Very easy to setup & use. The wireless speaker can be put anywhere you need. The sound from the speaker is comparable to the sound from the tv speaker. We are VERY pleased with this. Its from LSS Products, you can find it online at lssproducts/product/Serene-TV-Soundbox-Wireless-TV-Speaker/television-listening-systems
Its sells for $149.99, well worth the price I think.

The other item is a set of eyeglasses that can be worn with or without her seeing glasses. They magnify the tv screen bringing it very close to her, they are adjustable to focus whats best for you. This is from Active Forever, they are called Task Vision & sell for $79.99, they can be seen at activeforever.com/task-vision-tv-glasses its fantastic how well these work for the price. I hope these will help someones mom.

As mom's hearing started to be a frustration, I made sure I said her name first to be sure I had her attention before I started my sentence. I also realized that her cognitive abilities were part of the issue, so speaking slowing and taking time to better enunciate really helped. I set the TV for 'hearing impaired' and it writes what's being said on the bottom of the screen - that way I didn't have to turn the sound up to '36' :)

My Dad is 90 and has worn hearing aids for 10 years or more. They used to help, but lately he has unending problems with his hearing. I swear they are only plugging up his ears - preventing what sounds could get through, from getting through! I am going to suggest that he just stop wearing them, they are more trouble than they are worth. I am constantly changing the batteries (have spent a fortune on batteries lately!) testing them, cleaning the wax guards, etc. We are constantly at the audiologist getting them tested and, like someone else stated, they work fine at the audiologists and hours later we are back to the same problems. I am tired of it and I am sure my dad is as well. I love the idea of a "pocketalker". I had never heard of them, but that may solve our problems. Anyway, I am used to people staring at us as I yell things to Dad in public. I am sure they are thinking to themselves "Shame on her, she should get her father a set of hearing aids". Isn't that funny?? So, yeah, don't stress out about not having the funds for hearing aids. You are actually so much better off without them :) All the best to you.

We love dad and took him to the best audiologist and got him the most expensive hearing aid. He has never used it. Not even once. He wanted it. His nurse has offered to assist him. He does not want to fuss with it. Hopefully, someday I can give it to someone who needs it and will really use it.

Veronica mentioned oil in the ears to remove excessive wax. In California at least, there is an over-the-counter product: DEBROX that can be used at home if you see excessive wax or dirt in there. This may allevate the need for an earwash. She is correct, not to use hot water. I have done this procedure in the doctor's office, using tepid/lukewarm water. I guess now I am hoping there is not too much activity going on in mom's ears to over-stimulate or irritate her ears. What, exactly, is her complaint about her ears?

Chris, maybe ask if Dad could swtich to "open fit" - that's what I use and I do not think I could tolerate completely-in-canal. They are probably just worn out in any event. Maybe try a different audiologist if this one won;t listen (no pun intended - just like docs, some do and some don't!) and just keeps beating the same dead horse instead of thinking outside the box a little.