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When my mother is at my home, it seems she can’t or won’t do anything for herself. We have decided it will be best for her quality of life if she moves to an AL facility. She is having a nurse assessment this morning for admittance to AL. They have various levels of care with increasing charges. If she gets to the highest level it will be comparable to the nursing home. I would prefer that she is in AL because she will have her own room with her own furniture and personal things but I don’t want her moved as soon as she gets settled in because she requires more help.

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If you can afford to pay for the level of care she requires as it increases then you can put her in the AL. A nursing home will not take someone that doesn't need that level of care yet. It is based on current need not future expectations.
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My dad was at AL and over the years his needs increased to a point that, not only would he not be able to afford, but the AL was not equipped to manage his level of care. at that point he would have qualified for a nursing home (private pay), but I opted to move him into a board and care facility (aka residential care facility) which is small 6 bed home, but licensed just as a big AL. The ratio was better, and they could provide him the closer supervision and help that he needed. The cost of the one I found was only slightly higher than the AL with full services.
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Even if they are accepted into assisted living they will be asked to leave if the level of care exceeds what they are able to do.

I know two women who had their husbands in assisted living. It was a wonderful facility and they did all that they could for each of them. The level of care they needed became higher than they were able to accommodate. Each husband is now in a nursing home.

It’s hard because the wives wanted their husband to be with them. Things don’t always work out as planned.

You can start in assisted living and if a time comes that you have to move they will tell you that they are unable to serve your needs. Or you can start off in a nursing home if you wish to avoid a move if that is going to be inevitable. Just food for thought. I wish you and your family well.
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Isthisrealyreal Oct 2019
A nursing home requires a need to be eligible to be placed, that is the challenge. It can not be based on future need.

A lot of the assisted living facilities that I have looked into can provide all the care required, you just have to pay for it. The only thing that would require transfer is needing to be l9cked in for safety.

These facilities are all over the place with what they are called and what care they will provide. It is frustrating.
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