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I am married and have 3 grown up daughters. However, as I am always stressed out and very resentful towards my sisters lack of support, it's beginning to take its toll especially with my marriage...HELP!!!!!

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Did your sister promise support?
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Forget about your sister. Use your moms money to hire help. If mom has no money file for Medicaid.
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Does your sister know you need help with your mom? Has she said that she will help you? If not, I'd ask her if she is able and willing. If not, then, I'd accept her answer. Some people aren't inclined to do things like that, so, I wouldn't let it bother you. I agree about hiring help. It's too much for one person around the clock. Can your mom afford it? If not, I'd explore what benefits she might be entitled to.
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Looloo123, we must remember that not everybody is cut out to be a hands-on caregiver, I know I wasn't.

You wouldn't want a person who would go into sheer panic if a parent fell down, and not able to think correctly on what to do next.

Everyone has something that they are really good at. Is sister good with finances, then have her do Mom's bill paying and checkbook balancing. What about grocery shopping? What about doing meals? It doesn't all need to be hands-on care with the parent. But every little bit does help.
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Are you on talking terms with your sister? Could you ask for help on some specific things, like paying bills, getting supplies etc.? It is important to be specific in your expectations. Not enough to think well she knows I need help. That's too general. Talk about what kind of help you need. And if she offers money to pay for services, that is a form of helping too.
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I'm guessing your situation is like mine was. It would take a complete idiot to live 10 minutes away and not know that you need help --for 5 years. And I'll bet you have asked, hinted, cajoled and cried. And even someone who's not into care-giving can give you a break, just sitting with her, for an afternoon or evening a few times a month. If all I had to do was visit, I'd give it that much time. Then there's the money, if there is any. If you don't have POA, and even if you do, it can be a fight to spend any of it on help. It took awhile, but I realized it was up to me to change my situation. Best of luck.
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"it's beginning to take its toll especially with my marriage"

What is taking the toll? Your resentment and frustration with your sister, or all the time and attention you must spend on your mother?

Both have solutions, but not the same solution, perhaps.

As others have said, forget about your sister in relation to caring for your mother. You can only control your own behavior. You decided to have Mom live with you. But letting go of the resentment of your sister may not be a do-it-yourself project. Try. If you have a spiritual leader, talk it over with him or her. And certainly consider counseling. You deserve to be free of this anxiety and resentment. A therapist can help you with that.

Joining a support group for caregivers could be very helpful, too. AgingCare is kind of an online support group. I hope you find it useful. But try to find a local group, too.

Others have suggested solutions to spending so much time on caregiving. Use Mom's money to hire help. Start with with mundane housework that anyone can do -- get someone to vacuum and dust and do the laundry, etc. This frees up some of your time and energy. Then hire the appropriate level of help for Mom. She has mobility issues. I think it will be much easier to find suitable help than if she had dementia, for example.

Also consider adult day health programs. (Adult day care.) She could sign up for one day a week or as many as she likes. She can interact with other adults, participate in many activities (or not, her choice), and have a good hot lunch. Some programs have additional services. The one my husband attended could provide a shower, and they had a podiatrist come in periodically for those who needed the toenails trimmed! Most programs have a bus or van that picks people up and returns them to their homes. And, of course, this gives you some valuable respite time.

These things cost money. What is Mom's financial status? If necessary, apply for Medicaid.

If you try some counseling and you hire some help and this situation is still taking a toll on your marriage, then maybe the solution is for Mom to live somewhere else, probably an Assisted Living Facility.
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My main concern is that it is starting to take a toll on your marriage. Does your husband need a break from your mother? Or does he need to see it taking less a toll on you and your mood? If it is affecting your marriage, you have to consider your spouse and discuss what may be the best thing for your mother. Since the sister doesn't visit, your mother may be happier in a senior community where she could have company about. You know your mother, so know what she would like. IMO, your marriage should come first. There are other options for places for your mother.
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