She argue with us and says she does not like to lose her hair due to frequent washing,but as for now she did not wash them a few weeks and looks terrible.Regards and thanks in advance for your time.Ps.I am not sure if I have a right to be at the forum???
If you are able to take her to a salon, as others suggested, that might help. Is there one that she regularly went to before? If you talk to the ladies in advance, they could make a little fuss welcoming her and saying they want to make her pretty hair even prettier, so that it's a positive experience for her. They don't need to cut it except for every few months.
Plus you can buy online at Amazon or Walmart the waterless shampoo and conditioner caps that you just warm in the microwave a few seconds and then put on her head tucking in all her hair and just rub it around. They work pretty well. I had to use them after my hip replacement surgery and couldn't get in the shower for a while and I also used them on my husband when he became bedridden towards the end of his life.
Welcome to the forum!
It's hard to make that leap from asking her as a partner to taking over the decision and saying it's time to....do x y or z but that is what happens. You should try to avoid giving her the option to say no to certain things. You do it kindly, and because you want her to be clean. She might still put up a fight but if it is the shower cap wash then you don't have to get her hair wet etc, take a long time where she could get fed up and resist midway through. Water seems to freak them out.
If you are getting her to bathe you are fortunate, do you have home care to help with that? If so what do they say?
A couple of ideas for you - take her to a salon once a month for a wash and cut, then maintain at home with dry shampoo and a good brushing.
welcome to the forum.
i learnt about the waterless shampoo and conditioner caps funkygrandma59 has suggested on this forum and thought they are brilliant.
i couldn’t warm them up as mum doesn’t have a microwave but they made everything a lot easier - mum has Parkinson’s, Parkinson’s dementia and very bad arthritis in her spine. I still put towels around her so she felt warm and she was on a chair in front of the telly!
it’s a great alternative if you can get to a salon etc
take good care
We Canadians are very welcome by our American friends here. Obviously there is more of them as per demographic. And great advice!
BTW, have you engaged homecare, they help with showers and respite?
And support for caregivers, I get 3-4 hours respite every day!
And when sadly time comes for more care or placement they do it all!
As Lea suggested Shampoo-Hassle-Free-Bedridden-Chamomile-Medcosa are available on Amazon.ca.
You have every right to be on this forum. You are a caregiver.
You are taking care of your wife with dementia.
You need advice from peop0le that are going through the same thing or have gone through it.
You will learn, if you don't know already that none of us can or should do this alone. We all need help.
You may have to wash her hair for her.
Getting the head wet can cause anxiety.
Washing the hair is complicated.
getting the items you need
getting the water temp right
what bottle of stuff to use first
there are a lot of decisions.....
what you might want to do if you are able to get her out is take her to a salon and they can do a wash and if she needs a trim they can do that and then style it.
Your other option would be to get someone in a few days a week to give her a shower or bath and wash her hair as well.
I am wondering if she needs help with personal hygiene as well. So maybe someone helping her is not a bad idea.
Sadly, part of dementia is no longer being capable of making sound decisions. Your wife cannot be in charge of hair washing, she likely doesn’t recall the steps, or may have fear associated with it. The choices now are for you to do it of hire an aide to help with it.
I hope you’re able to get regular breaks and care for yourself. I wish you peace
https://www.amazon.com/Shampoo-Hassle-Free-Bedridden-Chamomile-Medcosa/dp/B08KYD2VQH
You'll need to go to Amazon in Canada, but this gives you an idea of what we're talking about.
Your wife may be afraid of water on her face. If so, the beauty parlor idea is ideal since they use sinks where you lay back and get no water in your face.
Best of luck to you.
If you want to try something different, I’d suggest that you sit her (naked and chin up) on a plastic chair in a warm room with a floor drain, have a bucket or two filled with warm water next to her, and use a dipper to wet her hair. Then shampoo it and finally dipper it clean. Use a very wide tooth comb, very gently, to get the tangles out. Hold each lock of hair while you brush the tangles out at the ends, so that you don't pull on her scalp.
Combing from the bottom up with a wide-toothed comb is the recommended method for detangling hair, particularly for curly, thick, or wet hair, as it minimizes breakage and reduces pulling.
Key Techniques and Tips:
Start at the Ends: Begin detangling at the bottom (ends) of your hair and slowly work your way up toward the roots.
Best Time to Use: This method is ideal in the shower while conditioner is in, or on damp/dry hair to remove knots without destroying curl patterns.
Product Distribution: The wide-tooth comb is excellent for distributing conditioner or styling products evenly throughout the hair.
Benefits: This technique helps prevent frizz, reduces hair loss, and is gentler on the scalp than standard hairbrushes.
Usage: For best results, use the comb to gently tease apart knots rather than forcing it through, which helps maintain hair health and shape.