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My husband refuses to ask for Aid and Attendance although he served 20 yrs in the US Army. He is now retired. What kind of help can I get for myself?

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Yes there are Veteran nursing homes throughout the US for in patient care. I don’t know if there is a way to have the VA pay for a civilian facility if there isn’t one near you.
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Contact the Veteran's Administration. Sounds as if you would probably be eligible.
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