It finally happened. After weeks of being called a pain in the you-know-what, yelled at over things that are not my fault, ignoring a nasty attitude and patiently trying to solve problems (that aren't really problems), I lost my cool and snapped. I yelled back at my grandma after being called names and screamed at.
I'm not really proud, but there's only so much a person can take. I feel so embarrassed and even ashamed of myself. I know I should have just walked away once she got started, but that is easier said than done, and I was handling the situation well until... I didn't. I'm just so tired of being put down while stopping my own life to care for someone who doesn't want to be cared for, who calls me mean names, tells me I'm wrong and stupid. My life has taken a backseat and all I do is worry about her well-being. And my life certainly isn't a walk in the park right now (I work in health care administration and found out I narrowly avoided furlough just yesterday). I'm just so tired and frustrated and need to take a step back. I've already got 3 missed calls from her today alone as if nothing happened (well, one voicemail was a weak apology for yelling) and I'm just ignoring for now. Anyway, sorry for venting, this situation is just so hard and I'm tired of feeling like this.
On to the real issue... my grandma seems to think her HHAs are housekeepers/maids. She's picking a fight with one HHA who she used to love, saying she doesn't listen and doesn't ever clean her house (which is untrue, her place has been spotless since this particular HHA joined her case). My solution was to put up a chore chart, to make sure things get done (the HHAs can "check off" the tasks they've completed) and I want to also include cooking and bathing as my grandma refuses help with either. She has help in her home 4 hours a day, 7 days a week. The chore chart was a no-go with my grandma. I am thinking that my grandma THINKS she tells her HHAs what to do, but in reality she tells them not to do anything and therefore thinks it doesn't get done. Does anyone have any other creative ideas on to how to combat this?