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I never really asked much about durable power of attorney in Oklahoma, but since my sister quit talking to her which they always have had alot of problems but I gave my job up and she was supposed to make the rest of the house payments. I don't know what to do and I'm not qualified to help her.  It as far as making me to the point I'm so sick I am not gonna be able to see about her. She draws retirement and social security and money since my father passed away. Will they take it all or does it depend. I just don't know what else to do. Could someone, if you can, pleasae tell me. Thank you

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You find a facility for mom and go back to work so you can make your house payments. You need a caregiver agreement for mom to be paying you even if it is your house payment or if she will need Medicaid in the future they may determine that money is a gift and mom would then be penalized and ineligible for Medicaid.
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Please re-read gladimhere's post, Balesgirl. You must protect your physical health and your financial health.

From this very site about caregiving agreements: https://www.agingcare.com/documents/personal_care_agreement_AgingCare.pdf
If your mother or you have an attorney it's wise to check with him or her.

I believe you're also hinting about placing your mom in a nursing home? Please do. They should have a person who can advise you about the ins and outs of how it's paid for.
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thank yu so much u have no idea the blessiing yu have been ...now i understand n u sent the link the lawyer i talk to didnt mention anything but sueing my mother ive been so upset n i feel guilty cus i promised her n i never thought thought my mom would go thru like denial so bad she actually says she hates me n its broke my heart to be honest .....the first year or so she would treat me human n i knew my older sister not coming around was hard but i even tried to pay my older sister ......i just am afraid of her getting worse n tho often i forget myself alort lately im trying so hard to figure a way cus my sister threatened w the nursing home is when she got the P.O.A i jus never imagined this could happen ....but i do kno the old saying is true yu wont think it can happen but it can again ur awesome thank yu sooo very much
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thank yu also for just noticing cus yes im like torn what to do cus i broke my word n the last 4 months she has more less gulted me w that u are so awesome overall for everything thank yu im printing the documents now
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People get old and often lose their filters and say things that they would never have said in their "prime". Saying that you hate your child--unthinkable, yet my mother has told me many times she wished I was never born, etc. Now she's really old, she's suddenly sweet. I am so confused. Was she lying when she wasn't "demented" or is she lying now?

In the end, it doesn't matter. Manipulating people to make them step in line is hurtful and wrong. Your mom probably has enough assets to place her in a nice facility. Then you can visit or not, depending on your own wishes.

The guilt will abate. She'll bug you for a while, but you can always walk away. Maybe get some therapy and help to work on setting boundaries with mom.
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