I have a lot of siblings and 3 in charge. Still lots of arguing because they are overworked and still letting the parents run the show.

djhurst7, regarding the parent that cries, please clarify why they are crying. Is the parent crying because they want the spouse to move into a facility? Or crying because they don't what the spouse to move out? That would give us more information.

Grief would be normal & expected when a couple is to be separated. Acceptance of independence waning & ill health causes much grief also.

I would say it's ok to be sad & it's ok to cry. (But I don't know the details). Hope things get easier for you.