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Your partner feels like WHAT is your paycheck? I don't understand your question.
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Lovely2045 Sep 2020
I get paid to take care of him and he feels like it’s his money too
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Same response as AlvaDeer.  I really don't understand the issues:  Whose paycheck, and from whom?   Who pays you to care for him?   What's the relevance of his feeling that it's a joint paycheck?

ETA:  just saw your response to Alva.   Who's paying you?   My interpretation would be that it's your paycheck, not his.   You're doing the work, right?    Is he expecting to share the paycheck?   

When I pay my lawn contractor, it's his money b/c he does the work.  I'm not entitled to share just because I provide the lawn.   

Be on guard; this doesn't sound right.
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If he needs a caregiver, what in the world does he need money for?
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Finances should never be ruled by feelings.

What are the facts?
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No, your paycheque is your paycheque.

How the two of you choose to handle bill payments etc, if you live together is another thing.

Things that would give more clarity to your question:
Who pays you?
Where do you live?
If you live together, who owns the home or pays the rent?
How are utilities and food costs handled?
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This is confusing. Does he pay you and feels like he can have the cake and eat it too? Or do you work for an agency? Is he a vet and benefits are paying your salary?

It doesn’t even matter really. This is your money that you are receiving for services rendered. Have you shared it so now he expects it? Where is his money?

Are you living there? Does he need you to chip in for utilities, groceries, and other expenses?

We need more information. Can you give more details please?
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I really kind of see where she is coming from. Couples usually share payroll checks in someway so you being paid is taking place of that payroll check.

Do you share a bank acct? Have you always split things down the middle and had separate accts or pay all bills from one acct?

If u have separate accts and split the bills and what is left over is yours to spend as u wish, then NO the money is not hers.

If you have an acct together, mingle your money together and pay bills out of that acct, taking out spending money for you both, then YES she shares in the money.

If her illness is causing her not to be able to work then if she hasn't she needs to sign up for short term disability. If she has and its depleted, then she should go, if she can, to Social Services to see what type of help she can get thru them.
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