I find it very hard to set boundaries with her...bc I guess as a child she relied on me like I was an adult...her partner even..not sexuslly ...but she put me in a position no child should be put in.. she wants me to rescue her. I can only tolerate her for an hour or less a week.I ask God to take her a lot recently..have a lot of unresolved stuff still with my Mom...she's in rehab right now, and it feels good to be away.She did find out a way to call me though..and has called me twice today.Turning phone off ..Self care HAS to be priority!
I was an only child with a very negative, self absorbed mother who had dementia also. It was an incredibly challenging 10.5 year period, I'll tell you that. Praying for God to take her was something I did regularly.....dementia is no "life" and mom wound up living to 95.
Wishing you the best of luck with a difficult situation.
What's the plan after rehab?
On the other hand, you already understand that you need to take care of yourself and that mom is a narc. You know you can't rescue her, and that is Truth.
I hope we will see more of your posts.