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She only visits 1 time wk but treats me and her mom horrible. I've been here a year and 1/2. Very under paid. Ithink 900 a month only have 24 hours a wk free. Pt. has dementia. I do housekeeping, yardwork. Plus she doesn't sleep much but I love her. I'm a medical assisstant so I care for a reaccurring wound on leg,  comfort her depression. Daughter won't do anti depressant. I've got her strong enough physical therapy n longer needed. She's healthier than in years and very happy. Daughter had neglectful people before me. Dehydrated, malnourished, theives. I'm worried who will care for her. The daughter just yells because the dementia. I'm so patient w her. I love her.

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You are a live in caregiver and are not paid even minimum wage? When live in care is needed, room and board are not considered as part of payment.

Are you paid overtime? I know the answer is no. Are taxes, social security, etc deducted from your check? Probably not.

What this daughter is doing is illegal. Start with calling the Labor Board in your state to help you with the situation. And Adult Protective Services they will make sure that the woman you are caring for gets the help she needs.
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Grandma1954 Mar 2020
Hattygirl...please follow this advice!
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Sounds like you are a good caregiver since your patient has improved over the time you have cared for her.

Can you negotiate the day off when her daughter is there?
And do you need a raise? Negotiate for that when and if you are asked to stay.

Bless you, wherever you work.
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hattygirl Mar 2020
This woman is so mean shes not willing to do anything.if i leave she can find someone whos desparate for place to live and pay less.the less she spends the more shell have when her mom passes.she doesnt care to much about the care.she didnt bat an eye when i gave notice.i think its cause i stand up to her for her mother when shes screaming at her.its so sad.shes 95 today and has dementia.the daughter makes horrible choices and lands her in the hospital often.today was my day off she didnt even show up.i hate that the truth is probably that this will be to much for me and she makes the desitions even if there bad ones.i know shell be so sad when i go.were buddies.but i no longer have a bottom lip from always biting it when daughters here.
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Hattygirl..I can not stress how important gladimhere's advice is.
You are worth far more than what you are getting paid. (not even going to mention that it is not legal what you are are paid) The worth I am talking abut is your care, compassion, dedication to someone that is in a situation you describe.
The daughter is verbally abusive to her mom
She is financially abusing you (not paying you what she should as well as not following the law for number of hours worked)
Please report the situation and as we often say on this site....you have to take care of yourself!!!
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At first she didnt want to give me anytime off....now im thinking that wouldve been better for everyone....well except me.but shes mad to be here and it only makes her mom so anxious and sad
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That is such a hard situation, hattygirl. You need to take care of yourself, though. You can't do anything about the way the daughter treats her mother. That is set in stone and will not change!

Best of luck to you, whatever you decide.
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I feel for you battygirl because you are a very loving kind Lady Who is extremely committed to this Lady Who you Care. Daughter sounds to me like that evil Neighbour from Hell. She should definitely be barred from visiting Her Mother because all the Lady you Care kneed's is the brilliant Care that you give, peace & harmony, food & medications, plenty heat and to be clean plus lots of love. Honestly I would not worry about the under payment of wages because money isn't every thing, but certainly I would not leave this por Lady and have that terrible Daughter Caring for Her Mother.
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What you need to do is call APS. Tell them the situation and that after 1 1/2 yrs you have given notice. You think that the lady will be vulnerable.
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How old is the daughter? If the mom is 95, the daughter is also elderly and may have medical issues, like dementia, of her own. She may need care herself.

Advice from others is sound.
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