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My nana moved in with me 2 months ago from Montana, she had a stroke so I moved her home. It's too much for me to do because I was recently diagnosed with ankylosing spondylitis and rheumatoid arthritis. I'm a single mom of 3 kids and I work full time. I have no family to take on her care and I have called every care facility in my area and in the surrounding areas up to 3 hours away and no one has any long term availability. What can I do? It's getting very painful to care for her. She needs 24 hour care. I do not have a signed anything stating I'm her responsible person. Also she is okay with going into a facility. I've talked to her about it. She was in a facility in Montana before I moved her in with me to California. I've thought about her going back there but I can't take her back and have no one to take her back to Montana. I dont want her that far from me as well.

If it comes down to it, there's always the ER option. They can't discharge her into an unsafe environment so they'll have to find a place for her or keep taking care of her. Some people are in hospitals for years.
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Tchemme88 Jan 22, 2020
Thank you. I honestly don't think I could do this on my conscience. She was just fine in Montana at the care facility and I felt horrible that she had no family there so I moved her in with me which I bow realize was a mistake. But nonetheless my heart is too big and I did it anyways. But thank you for this suggestion.
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Yes, its a bad gap in our healthcare system, but the ER "dump" remains an option because for some there is no other alternative.
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needtowashhair Jan 22, 2020
That's because we don't have a healthcare system. We have a patchwork of services that provide health care. There's no guarantee that that patchwork doesn't have holes.

In other countries, from the time you are born to the time you die, you are covered by the same system seemlessly. They do that with a higher standard of care at at least half the cost we pay for healthcare. I don't get why some people are so against paying less to get more.
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Who was paying for her care in the other state? Can she private pay? More likely to get her in LTC if she can private pay for a few months then switching to Medicaid when her money runs out.

I suggest you call Office of Aging and see what resources are for Gma. I think ur problem will be is she has not lived in Montana long enough for Medicaid. It doesn't go over State lines.
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Tchemme88 Jan 22, 2020
She was living in a home , had the stroke and then after being in the hospital was sent to a care facility where medicaid paid part and she paid 2000. She doesnt have any savings and gets 2000 a month from ssi and retirement. She lived in Montana for 4 years.
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The OP's mom does not live in Montana. She lives in California. You do not have to live in a certain state for a certain time period before becoming eligible for medicaid. For medi-cal, she they consider her a resident as of the day she arrived in this state.
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Tchemme88, I realize that your posted issue is finding care placement for your nana, but first things first: if you choose to help your nana find care and manage what you are able to manage for her, please tell her she absolutely must assign you as her durable Power of Attorney. Then you can advocate on her behalf legally. Without this, it will be very (and needlessly) difficult. You don't need to go to a lawyer. Download 2 copies of the durable Power of Attorney forms from either Legalzoom.com or Rocketlawyer.com for your state. There will be a nominal fee, like $40 maybe. You will both need to sign them in front of a notary (bank or hospital or govt office) and have 2 non-family adult witnesses present with you at that time. You need to create 2 original copies: 1 for her and 1 for you to present anywhere you need to be her legal representative. Banks may still require that you both (initially) show up in person if you are creating a joint account.

At her current financial status you will need to help her apply for Medicaid. If she has no assets and just SS, it won't be difficult. I think the "look back" period in CA is 2.5 yrs. so hopefully she has any info you will need. Once you send in the form it can take a minimum of 3 months for her to get qualification. Open any mail from their office since it is time sensitive and they may be requesting more info. The "proofs" that are requested (like a copy of her most recent bank statement) must be as current as possible. Send in the completed form asap or it will become "stale" and they will kick it back for current info. The form can be downloaded from the Department of Health and Human Services website. Contact them for guidance.

If nana incurs medical bills while she is waiting for approval, Medicaid will pay some or all of it depending on when she gets approved (I think there's a 3-mo window in my county in MN). Keep all bills and receipts.

In the meantime you can have social services come in and do an assessment for in-home services and resources. You can also contact your local area's Council on Aging for info and resources as well. Nana being a Medicaid recipient unfortunately will mean she is at the bottom of waiting lists for facilities, since the existing residents get first dibs. Do put her name on as many lists as possible. I don'w know how long it may take in CA...

If you're near a church you can contact it to see if they have a care ministry or can provide you a break or any kind of help -- you don't need to be an attender -- just tell them your predicament. I wish you all sorts of luck and mercy as you try to help your Nana!
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Tchemme88 Jan 22, 2020
Thank you. My mom is her power of attorney and I'm the second person in case something happens with my mother. She is not able to care for my nana since she is sick herself. I have applied for IHSS and am waiting for medi-cal to be approved. They take a while. I'm not sure how many hours she will be approved for but I dont think they can approve 24 hour care which is what she needs.
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Have you contacted your local Area Agency on Aging to see if their SWs can help you find a placement? There may also be some in home services available like bathing assistance that would help until you can find a good placement.
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Tchemme88 Jan 22, 2020
I do have a bath lady that comes once a week. That's all she is allowed. After reading these comments I did call the adult services place and left a message with the referral and help division so hopefully they could help.
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Tchemme88 you stated below: "My mom is her power of attorney and I'm the second person in case something happens with my mother. She is not able to care for my nana since she is sick herself. I have applied for IHSS and am waiting for medi-cal to be approved. They take a while. I'm not sure how many hours she will be approved for but I don't think they can approve 24 hour care which is what she needs."

So, are you an alternate? Or are you joint on the PoA with your mom? Does the PoA state that both of you need to approve an action (like sign checks) or only 1?

Please know that if this is all too overwhelming (as you may choose to become your mom's caregiver as well) it might unfold that your only realistic option is for you and your mom to resign as PoAs and allow the county to take guardianship of your nana. They will make sure she is placed and cared for. You won't have any say on where they place her and you won't be privy to any of her financial/medical info but at least you won't need to be juggling care for 2 people and your children. I'm not saying this lightly, as I can barely imagine being in your situation with small children of your own BUT your immediate family (your children) are your primary responsibility. Anything that erodes your ability to parent them in an optimum way (and impact your mental and physical health) needs to be outsourced. As a single parent, your kids come first. I wish you all the best!
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Tchemme88 Jan 23, 2020
Im the alternative. My mom is cared for by her husband. You are right it is affecting my children and that's why I made the decision to place her in a home. There is a comment above that the person said the county wont accept guardianship over her in california. So now I have no idea on what I'm going to do.
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IHSS does not pay for 24 hour care. Your grandma won’t be given more than 40 hours a week. And the county won’t jump up and take guardianship of your grandma and make sure she’s cared for. Maybe that happens in other states but it doesn’t happen in California. So thinking that the county will step in and take care of her would be nothing but a pipe dream. It would take a very long time for the county to assume to guardianship.
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Geaton777 Jan 24, 2020
Worried, in the MN county that took guardianship of my stepFIL it didn't happen right away either, it took several months, and not sure what factors dictate the timing: number of people and the court's schedule? Number of social workers? Budget? I'm sorry to hear that in CA it's not as viable a solution as in other places. There is so much need and exhaustion and desperation...it's heartbreaking.
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