I am concerned because my mother when she first went to live at my brother & sister in law's home she said to me, "You won't believe what I had to do to stay here." Well, it ended up mom moved her pension and S.S. up where she is after staying 2 years. She kept saying they don't want anything, they just want to keep me. But I feel different. I know that mom wanted to give her money because of how the will was written. Plus mom had always given them money over the years. I don't care that she wanted to do this because she is keeping her but to do everything behind my back is wrong. Mom wanted to pay everyone a % each month for her care. I wrote a check monthly to my sister in law. Then when mom moved her money up there and I wrote checks to them without knowing what she did. With the pension not being on my bank statement I wasn't looking for it. So basically she was double paid for 8 months until I started to wonder why my checking was lowering. I ended up talking to the lawyer because I was worried as to what mom would take out. So I was advised to take her name off. Then I also put a code on the checking because I felt that the sister in law would call to find out what's in the accounts. Well, she tried. It was none of her business I felt. They never came around over the years to see my mom and dad and they were deeply hurt. That's why mom did her will the way she did. With all her money going their way, I feel it's wrong. I will be the one paying bills at the end and it will be coming out of her money that I have. Mom just doesn't understand that when she passes, they will keep what is in my sister in law hands, she thinks she will pay the bills. What I wrote out of my checking to pay them I've lost. Do I have any rights to change where the money is because with her Parkinson's she isn't thinking clearly.
Let me see if I understand the situation correctly:
-Your Mom currently lives with your brother & sister-in-law in another city (because your Mom is unable to take care of herself due to her Parkinson's?);
-Your Mom moved her money from Bank A (which is in city you live in) to Bank B (which is in same city your Mom currently is living in with your brother);
-Your sister-in-law is “keeping” your Mom (What do you mean by “keeping”—What type of personal care or assistance with ADLS is your sister-in-law performing for your Mom?)
-You write checks on your Mom’s Bank B checking account to pay your SIL for “keeping” your Mom. (Who are signees on this bank account? Is the checking account in Bank A still open?)
-You do not receive monthly statements from your Mom’s checking account in Bank B.
-Your Mom’s pension & SS are directly deposited into her checking account in Bank B.
-Whose name did you take off of which checking account—Bank A or Bank B?
-“I will be the one paying bills at the end and it will be coming out of her money that I have. Mom just doesn't understand that when she passes, They will keep what is in my sister-in-law’s hands, she thinks she will pay the bills. What I wrote out of my checking to pay them I've lost.” (Do you have some of your Mom’s money in a third checking account in Bank A? Are you using your own money to pay your SIL for "keeping" your Mom? Does your Mom think that your SIL will pay your Mom’s bills-either for your Mom's care in a LTC facility or for her funeral?
-Are you the Durable/Financial POA for your Mom? How long have you been your Mom’s DPOA? (POA and executor of the will are completely different from each other.)
Please clarify your situation as I am confused as to exactly who is paying who from which checking account.