I am my wife's primary caregiver. We have caregivers come in a couple times a week. When I leave our apartment to go do something, my wife goes out the door looking for me. If the caregiver is cooking, she has to turn off the stove and follow after my wife to bring her back. My wife gets into things as she is walking which disturbs other residents. If I can't go for a walk or do something on my own, what is the point of paying a caregiver? Any suggestions for either issue would be greatly appreciated.
In addition to a more complicated lock on the door that your wife can't operate unsupervised, you can also try camouflaging the door so your wife won't recognize it as a door.
There are stick on murals that can be applied to the door so it looks like a bookcase. Also, a black doormat can look like a hole to someone with dementia.
https://www.alzstore.com/door-murals-peel-and-stick-p/0364.htm
https://www.silverado.com/journey-resources/dementia-proofing-your-home-a-caregivers-guide-to-safety-and-comfort/
You might begin thinking about whether your wife will need a memory care placement, if her needs increase. I'm sorry you and she are experiencing these issues.
You could look into having Meals on Wheels delivered, if cooking is an issue.
Get locks for your doors and secure them when you leave. The caregiver will need to know how to unlock them for safety reasons, of course.
The above suggestions will only help for a short period of time. Your wife needs 24/7 care with professional caregivers. Then you'll be able to do what you want - but you will need to visit her often, especially at first. Start looking at facilities while your back isn't to the wall yet. I wish you luck in finding a great place for your wife.
Again that would mean hiring 2 different people, one to cook and one to keep your wife occupied while you're out and about.
And of course if caring for your wife is now getting to be just too much for you it may be time to look into having her placed in the appropriate facility.
Were you there at home, it would be the SAME, but now it is the purview of the caregiver hired on to--yes-- turn off the stove and run get your wife. This is what the caregiver is hired to do. Stop worrying about it the time you are free.
Eventually this will not be sustainable. You are one person. Your wife now requires the help and supervision of an entire SHIFT OF PEOPLE. She may need placement. That is just a fact in all of this, and I am so sorry for it. I wish you the best of luck.