I am full-time caregiver for my 90-year-old husband, who has White Matter dementia. He often wakes me up at night, so I nap during the day. He has taken to going out the front door while I'm asleep. Once he's out, he's lost. Doesn't know his address or phone number.
Sometimes, I can find him quickly. Other times, neighbors have found him and called the police. The police want me to put a tracking bracelet on him, but he absolutely refuses (he is strong enough to prevent it). Also, the monthly subscription isn't cheap.
I would like to put a double-cylinder deadbolt on the front door, which I can lock while I'm sleeping, or doing home chores where I can't watch him every minute. It seems like such an easy solution. However, I'm concerned a locksmith may refuse to do this. And am not sure I can do a good job of replacing the lock myself.
Insights appreciated, thanks.
I finally got up the courage to speak to a Sheriff's Deputy.
The deputy said to go ahead and install the double-sided lock, as it likely would prevent very dangerous escapes in the dark, falls on the front steps, etc.
Then I called a locksmith, who said, of course, we do those installs all the time for the very reason you called about.
I realize this is only a stopgap measure, and more steps are in our future. Thanks again to all.
also attach bells to all doors that lead to outside.
my mom has sundowners-wanders at night .
we have attached bells to all door handles. My hubby has installed additional locks up higher on all doors that lead to outside.
we also have had to block off our kitchen area -as my mom would wander around kitchen-raid the fridge, leave fridge doors open, use microwave ( she actually blew up 2
microWaves ) then she would try to use the stove. So for many safety reasons-blocking off the kitchen area at night gave us some peace of mind.
Now she limited to wandering. I’m on night shift alert -as my hubby works. I recently had to resign from my part time nightly job. As my mom has become more aggressive at night -I didn’t want my hubby to have to deal with her alone. Or Heaven forbid if my mom called 911 or broke a window.
With sundowners, my mom has no sleep pattern. She doesn’t even sleep during the day -maybe a 10 minute catnap sometimes.
We are lucky when she doesn’t wander maybe 1 or 2 nights of the week (not consecutive though) it’s usually after 3 -4 straight days & nights of no sleep -she is finally exhausted.
Her doctor will not prescribe anything to make her drowsy.
Im in the process of getting my mom placed in an assisted living facility. They can provide 24/7 care . I’ve just gotten overwhelmed-my health is depleting. Her social worker & mine highly recommended that it’s time & for the best to get her placed.
They both have told me that for me to take care of me first !! Just like when on a plane “ need to put oxygen mask on ourselves first -to be able to care for others “
Defender Security Satin Nickel U 10827 Door Reinforcement Lock – Add Extra, High Security to your Home and Prevent Unauthorized Entry – 3” Stop, Aluminum Construction Finish
Needless to say, the transport chair has slowed him up big time from trying to get out the exits due to tiny wheels. But yes, he has figured out the brakes already.
As a quick short term solution until you install different front door locks or add other devices to keep your husband from wandering out of the house when your back is turned, here is a brilliant round-doorknob-locking-device. This would be helpful on any round doorknobs which don’t even have to themselves lock (like your bedroom door). Again, this product is for purchase on Amazon and requires no installation, just snap it on and lock & unlock it with the provided key, here is the link https://www.amazon.com/PRIME-LINE-S-4180-Door-Knob-Lock-Out-Device-–-Prevents-Turning-of-Door-Knob-and-Access-to-Keyhole/dp/B00BOZBDK6/ref=cm_wl_huc_item
The product name is Prime-Line S 4180 Door Knob Lock-Out Device
Best wishes to you and your husband.
Maybe you can get an ID bracelet on him with your emergency contact info or maybe your can hire a few hours a day helper so you can get some rest.
Praying for you. Your husband is blessed to have you.
my thoughts and prayers go out to you. It is an extremely difficult and heartbreaking job caring for your loved one with dementia.