It seems like my husband says, "he will..." but, then doesn't do his breathing treatments. Any advice?


If I sit there and debate with him about his care, it seems like he is not intending on doing whatever it is, and it frustrates me. So, I don't talk about itCause I see this happen. I know he is trying and I am finding ways to not get upset. So, I manage his medicine, but I cannot force him to do his breathing treatments. I talkabout it sometimes as a reminder. He doesn't bathe, so I sometimes will help him clean up a little. I watch his skin and somtimes we will both go and get a pedicure. This next month we both will get one. That is a way of relaxing for me, plus he gets good care for his feet. They do a great job.

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How do I get ME to do what I should?

People hate being told what to do. Does he understand why it's important to do it? What awful thing will happen if he doesn't do it? Does the doctor know he doesn't do it? Why doesn't he like to do it? Does he forget to do it because of dementia?

Can you make a joke about it? "Are you ready for the gas chamber?" as you hand him the equipment. Can you offer a bribe, maybe by asking him to do it right before lunch, or right before you take him to the VFW?

It is really hard. What have you tried already?
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MDI's , then have him do it when he brushes his teeth.
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set up his nebulizer in front of his fav TV show. Does he have a mask or mouthpiece? Maybe it's time for a mask if he has a mouthpiece? They actually only need about 10 minutes to work, not the 20 or 30 until they run dry. If he uses MD
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I worked with a crew of men for many years, so I have some insight on what they like to do. Instead of a pedicure, he would probably like to sit in a tavern full of contemporaries and cheer on their favorite football team. He might enjoy a game of cards at the VFW with chatter about the big fish of the day, the huge buck that got away, the impossible golf shot, the new waitress at the diner who is either exceptionally ugly or has big bazooms. Of course they always complain about their wives if none are present. I'm not encouraging this behavior, I'm simply observing it. They thoroughly enjoy each other and say crude things to each other they would never say in mixed company. They cheerfully have nicknames for each other that are not repeatable. They won't ask him to do breathing exercises, but he'll be laughing so hard he won't have to. Get him some time in a man cave. No skirts allowed.
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