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My mother's DPOA is my son. We are estranged and he will not share the whereabouts or condition of my 90 year old mother. I contacted an ombudsman at the Red Cross and learned that she had recently been moved from AL to a higher level of care. My son is keeping all information about her private and can legally do so.

She has been my mother for 69 years and this is very upsetting. I'm afraid I won't even know if she passes away. I certainly don't wish it, but there are other family and legal property reasons that I would need to know it. Suggestions?

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Pstegman is correct.. If you own property with your Mom you better see a lawyer if you know she can't afford the AL...
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Sylvie, I hope for your sake she is in a NH on private pay and not Medicaid. Jointly owned property could be at risk if she is on Medicaid. They will come after it when she dies. Maybe you should see a lawyer if it is a large amount.
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Your profile says you are caring for your grandmother????????? who is at asisted living and your mother is 90 years old! Maybe you meant your mother. It still doesn't make sense if you do not know where your mother is. The only thing I can suggest to your question is to try to reason with your son. Are you more interested in her wellbeing or her assets? You do mention property reasons.
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You can do a check on the website legacy because they have a national database of obituaries. Death notices must be published and you would find it there. The Will becomes public after someone dies so the Executor would contact all heirs.
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Debralee, I am not a direct caregiver. The Profile options were too narrow to adequately describe the circumstances. My mother and I jointly own property together. As stated, my estranged son is her DPOA. I live more than 2,000 miles from him and whatever facility to which she has been moved.
away in another state, but am listed as backup DPOA.
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