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I have been taking care of my mother for a year in my home. She is 93. She has Lewy Bodies disease. She is so mean I just can’t do it any more. I have gone to support groups. I got a great Day Care lined up for her and she took a tour and refused to go. She is miserable and wants to make sure everyone around her is miserable. Now I am going to find an Elder Attorney to try to get conservatorship. I would appreciate if anyone has done this and what to expect.

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Perhaps one more immediate option is to stop doing whatever you do to support her in your home. You are what is keeping her OK there. If you stop - no meals, no toilet assistance, no response to calls - she will soon see the need for change. It probably won't take long, not enough to be dangerous to her health.
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Jada824 Apr 2019
I really don't think she can do that, it might be considered neglect or abuse.
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Because of her dementia, you wont be able to reason with her. She won’t understand. I’m not sure this is a viable option, but what if you tell her you are having work done on the house and she will have to go stay somewhere “for a while”. Explain the house will be full of strangers, noise and uproar. Then find a memory care facility for her. Of course, when she asks, “the house isn’t done yet”.
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JoAnn29 Apr 2019
Like that
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You may just have to wait for the next mini crisis that takes her to the ER then refuse to take her home.

For now I also agree with backing off on assistance. If anything she might realize how much you really do for her when you stop.
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Since ur going for conservatorship, I guess you don't have POAs in place? All conservator is going to give you is access to her money. It doesn't cover medical. That would be guardianship. That can be expensive. If Mom has money you can use hers to obtain them. Medicaid allows this if you ever need it. Can Mom afford an AL?
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Bamagirl88 Apr 2019
Mother has no money. She made no plans for her future. She lived with my sister until I was afraid she was going to cause my sister to have a heart attack.
May goal is just to get her put in a home with Medical. Which is in Ca. She refused to agree going on Medical.
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https://www.legalzoom.com/articles/conservatorship-vs-guardianship
In many states, a guardianship gives a person control over the personal, day-to-day decisions of a ward, while a conservatorship provides the authority to control another person's financial decisions. However, in some states, guardianship is the term used when the ward in question is a minor, while conservatorship applies to the care of an incompetent or incapacitated adult.
To best determine which term applies to your situation, you should look into how your state defines and applies both of these terms. Regardless of the definition, most states require an application or petition to the state courts to obtain the legal authority associated with conservatorship or guardianship. The actual steps of the process differ by state, so be sure to research what information you need to file as well as the filing and court dates you need to track .
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