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Twice, the DMV has almost given my mom her license when they have a doctor's report stating she is unfit to drive. I have to go behind my mom's back and tell them to look at their records.

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Thank you for keeping your mom off the road. A friend in this type of sittuation resolved it by telling the DMV clerks: When you make me go to the local radio station and explain about your incompetence on the daily news segment, you are not going to look too good. So let's work together and get it right. They did.
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While it's great the doc made a report and it's also nice if the DMV would do their job, the MOST important factor is to ensure she has NO access to a car. There are plenty of people who lose their licenses and still drive - not legally, but they do it anyway!

No clue why she's unfit to drive, but honestly the ONLY way to keep her off the road is NO access to a car.

My mother lived in a state that required self-reporting dementia. Like that would ever happen, except in rare instances. Most people with dementia deny deny deny. I could get nowhere with the doctors, and suspect the DMV would have been no better. I never even got her license revoked. Here's the issue, if this is dementia related:

YB did all the "talk" and took mom's car key. I merely stood behind him and said nothing. On the way out, I suggested disabling the car as I was sure she had another key. He pulled the battery cable (this won't work with car capable people or those with AAA type service!) The next day, who gets the nasty call? She accused me of taking her key (forgetting everything else) and demanded it back. When I told her I didn't touch her key (truth!), she asked who did. She was SO nasty to me that I said You're so smart, you figure it out and hung up. Day two, NASTIER call demanding I get down there right now and fix whatever I did to her car. So, she DID have another key AND managed to find it, only to have a dead car!!!

Anyone with dementia should not be allowed access to cars. If they are alone, remove the car to a place they won't see it and provide transportation. If they live with someone who has a car, either use The Club or have a kill switch installed. Trying to hide the keys may not work all the time.

The license is truly the least of your worries!
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rovana Aug 2021
Great post!!
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Mother had a 'breakdown' at the park (tried to start the car when it was still in gear). PoA asked me to confiscate the keys. He told her later that the problem had been with the ignition. Her BS meter went off, but she no longer had the keys. Later, when I cleaned the car, I saw that she'd already had to go to a 'better driver' class.
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Agree that car should be disabled and/or removed for "service". People have been known to drive without a license so that's not a 100% solution.
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What state is she in? Is she physically or cognitively unfit to drive? I reported my aunt in FL anonymously online due to both. I had her license info, and wrote a lengthy report of all the reasons why her privilege should be revoked immediately. The DMV sent her a letter calling her in for a retest, and my nephew drove her to her appointment. They asked how she got there and she told them. Then she failed the eye exam and they revoked her license.

My advice to you would be to disable or remove or sell her car as soon as possible so that even if she accidentally gets her license, she still can't go anywhere. Who is her PoA? This person can take the lead on getting this done legally.
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