Hi everyone,I’m looking for advice on how to properly and gently clean an elderly person after a bowel movement, especially if they’re having trouble passing stool completely. Recently, I had to help my loved one who couldn’t finish on their own, and I had to assist more directly than I expected. It was very uncomfortable and painful for her, and honestly, a very emotional and exhausting experience for me.
My main concern is her wellbeing and safety—if I have to do this again, I want to make sure I’m not causing her pain or putting her at risk. Does anyone have tips or guidance on the best way to handle this situation? Any advice or resources would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
They gave him an enema, then cleaned up the resulting mess, and sent me home (or prescribed) a bunch of stool softeners.
The hospice nurse suggested prune juice and more water in his diet, and regular use of stool softeners, as some medications cause constipation.
If your patient is already in pain and that is painful, you can use something like a squirt bottle (Like a dishsoap bottle with a small opening) with some baby oil or olive oil, have them lay on their side, and try and squirt a little oil into the opening, without being too invasive. There are also suppositories like Dulcolax which you can insert in the rectum and it will soften and lubricate the stool.
But, you ask how to clean the bedridden patient after a bowel movement.
Have them turn on their side, or you may have to turn them on their side, and use wet wipes. For a more comfortable experience, I warm the wipes or use warm, soapy water in a small basin. I always have a disposable underpad underneath, so it can get wet and soiled, then to remove it, fold or roll it up moving toward the patient, with most of the "bulk" down toward the legs, so there is not a big lump under their back, as you roll them back toward you, and continue removing the wet underpad from the other side of their body. I like to use two underpads, so I can remove most of the wet, soiled mess, and there is still a clean, dry pad under them, to continue cleaning if needed. it's really hard to clean someone thoroughly when they are laying in a wet mess. My husband moves around a lot, and inevitably rolls back in the poop while I'm trying to clean him.
If their skin is tender, and wiping is painful, then just squeeze the warm-water soaked wipe over them to rinse their skin with minimal touching, or use a small cup or squirt bottle to gently pour warm water over, then blot as gently as you can to finish. I find this works well for cleaning the hard to reach area between the legs, especially if they can't or won't open their legs.
In the beginning it is embarrassing for the helper and the patient, but it quickly becomes routine.
For women patients, just make sure to wipe from front to back. To avoid any infections.
I now take care of my bedridden wife, who has multiple sclerosis, and the problem is very severe. The feces back up all week long, and then she dumps it all at once. CaringWifeAZ is spot on. I would only add that I use a product called McKesson Perineal & Skin Cleanser RINSE-FREE.
She was impacted once before coming home from rehab and that was an ER visit. The rehab center didn’t attempt to remove anything from her colon. After that, we were instructed to always aim for a certain bowel consistency (peanut butter, sorry if that was TMI). She eats vegetables and applesauce and fruit cup everyday. We used to give her a stool softener once a day. Now things are happening on their own (8 mos later). Some days are blowouts ( if she’s eaten something that doesn’t agree with her or if she caught a stomach bug) other days are very manageable. We don’t allow her to go more than three days without a bm. We use diaper rash cream on her bum at night to prevent any skin irritation. She wears the adult briefs with tabs. If she wore the pull-ups, pulling them down if she’s done number 2, makes more of a mess. The sitter taught us to tear (or cut) the sides, then handle it like a diaper. As mentioned, always wiping a female from front to back. Then get her to roll to one side and finish cleaning the bottom area.
my father has them- they’re supposed to be daily but I only give when needed
We use something called. CosmoCol
and at night Senease
the doctor said they’re mild
I found altering my dads diet resolved the constipation
something with fibre in it for breakfast
And water - that causes so many issues - when my fathers water consumption was low he even gave signs of dementia - as soon as we got him to drink more it resolved - sips throughout day rather than go drink a glass was helpful
onto cleaning
can you speak to her doctor and see what help is available
my dad contracted a knee lick so can’t get out of bed presently and our care nurses clean him
i help passing things
so i think you need two people really one to hold and one to clean
roll on side while one person holds
Mum from falling
use bunched up Kleenex /tissue o. Top fir softness and wipe away excess waste
then wet wipes on water squeezed out wipe and throw in bin then wiped down with warm wet flannel and pat
dry never rub with soft tissue
follow with doctor prescribed anti sore cream ( like baby rash cream)
we use incontinence pants which can be torn at the sides and pop a disposable incontinence pad inspector so mostly you are only changing the inner pad ( less work)
so supplies small plastic bowl like a washing up bowl - a little disinfectant and maybe squirt of shower gel in warm water and tissues and Kleenex kitchen roll
some small pedal size bin bags
all that said it’s a task it really is- speak to doctor and care charities and find out where you can get help
Sorry if this doesn’t help
take what you need from it
( we lay incontinence sheets under dad to Kay on- line puppy pads but fur humans ) and it mostly stops any leaks at night and reduces cleaning - mum rolled over sheet folded and thrown in bin most dry- new sheet down-saves washing
don’t forget to use gloves
makes a bad task easier