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I chose to file my question under Working Caregiver. For the record:
I am all for social distancing.
I am all for people wearing masks in public.
I am all for COVID positive people not being admitted into nursing homes.
I am all for limiting the number of visitors at hospitals and nursing homes.
I am all for telemedicine.
I am all for the Subway being closed overnight for cleaning.
I am all for hand washing.
I am all for ZOOM meetings and telecommuting.
I am all for distance learning.
I am all for plexiglass shields protecting cashiers at the grocery store.
I am all for limiting the number of people who can be inside any store at once.
I am all for temperature checks.
I am all for contact tracing.
I am all for people working in a clean environment at least 6 feet apart.
I am all for keeping restrictions on people most at risk of having a severe case of or dying from COVID.
I am all for PPE for all health care workers having direct contact with patients.
I am all for travelers being put in 14 day quarantine.
I am all for new and stricter regulations to keep all workers regardless of industry safe!


However, a vaccine will not happen quickly and given that fact, what I am increasingly struggling to cope with and feeling angry about is this lockdown-fits-all approach to managing this pandemic. Los Angeles just announced lockdown through August. How many cities will follow suit?


This pandemic has shown that our health care system is horribly broken, and we can never go back to putting profits ahead of people. The PPE shortage is a national disgrace! But endless lockdowns or sporadic lockdowns are not the longterm solution to the design flaws of American health care.


My husband and I are spending our savings to weather this crisis. We pay our modest monthly condo charges because our building still needs to run. But all around us, neighbors' lives and livelihoods are being destroyed and some have stopped paying their rent or condo charges. Remember that unemployment doesn't cover many millions of workers.


We've endured many weeks of lockdown and what do we have to show for it? More lockdown and speeding up conveyor belts at slaughterhouses!


What we need is creative ways of getting businesses back open and people back to work safely. When is the retraining going to start of workers who can't go back to their old jobs? When is the reorganization of physical plants going to start so that people can go back to work and do so safely?


I applaud the salon lady in Texas and Elon Musk in Fremont for defying lockdown orders! People on this forum talk about how important work is for working caregivers and not just because of the money. Thankfully, I'm still working but hubby works on commission and zero sales means zero money.


I don't know why we stick around here anymore; we haven't seen my FIL in months!!! I am homesick and struggling with whether or not all this misery is worth it.

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Dear fellow commenters, please understand that once lockdowns are eased the virus infection rate (and therefore also death rate) WILL spike, but then it will decline. If the infection "models" are extrapolated beyond the summer months, you would be able to see this trend. No one in the media is talking about this because it doesn't sell. Politicians aren't talking about it because they are dopes beholden to poll ratings du jour and fear of criticism.
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Two weeks ago my boss wanted me to come back to work [I was working from home] and I dug in my heels and said no. I told him I am listening to the scientists and will follow their suggestions. My boss reply was pretty much "the scientists don't know what they are talking about".

My boss was out and about, even playing golf. Whenever I did pop into the office to grab a file I made sure he wasn't there, and washed my hands several times as we have a bar sink in our suite. I noticed the foam soap was always at the same level as when the last time I used it, so I knew my boss wasn't washing his hands.

Lo and behold, I get a call the other day, my boss is in the hospital with the C-19 virus. I hope he pulls through.

I worry about how many people my boss had infected along the way.... [sigh]. Such as putting his hands on the door handle of the exterior door of the building... pushing the elevator button inside and out.... hand on the door handle to our office.... the TV remote.... the coffee maker... file drawers.... telephone receiver/buttons.... anything metal or heavy plastic.

My primary doctor has Quest testing on-site, so I went there. The test is a blood test, not a swab test. So far I haven't been infected.

As for age, as I had mentioned before, my sig-other works at a cemetery. This virus know no age. It can hit anyone.

Be safe, my friends.
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OK, just another rant on here.. and believe me I do appreciate all the love people are throwing at the healthcare workers, I really do, But my giant hospital is covered with signs saying how we are healthcare heros, how much they love us.. etc. So a week ago all the employees got a email that we will not be getting raises or contributions to our retirements,, for 2 years!. Nice time to tell us that! Seems the hospital is taking a financial hit from the virus.. even though most of the ICUs and units have already converted back to normal! And we have so many "Vice Presidents" of this and that that we joke every time we get a memo that "that will need a new VP" Maybe fire a few of them and pass the money down to those of us who are actually working the front lines! Even the meal deliveries we get are not from the hospital,, they are from wonderful local businesses and pt families! Every time I leave work, and go to pay the $13. they charge me to park every shift I want to kick those dang signs!
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NYDaughterInLaw May 2020
That's really disheartening that you won't be getting a raise or retirement contribution for 2 years. You have to pay $13 to park? That's an hour's salary for some people! It's outrageous that hospitals have been allowed to get away with bare bones staffing of nurses and CNAs, while they expand their C suites.
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This is such a political play. It actually is sad that we the people are being used to try and destroy an ELECTED PRESIDENT!

I just lost all respect for our governor, whom I thought was a pretty intelligent guy and didn't play politics, but apparently the park and recreation pools need to be opened before other businesses. What?

I don't understand opening facilities that obviously can not accommodate masks or social distancing and not letting small businesses open for business without a host of requirements, when they are finally allowed to open.

Politicking has caused politicians to lose their minds.

Stay safe as you navigate back into life everyone.

Wondering why we aren't following Switzerland with their very successful actions.
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dogparkmomma May 2020
I am sorry but I cannot let this stand. This ELECTED president needs to be destroyed as quickly as possible. His refusal to listen to anyone, his ignoring facts in favor of what he prefers, his complete lack of empathy or concern and his desire to be re-elected at all costs is a huge reason why we are at the place we are. I do agree that the re-opening has been chaotic across the country, but that is because there is a complete lack of leadership or any sort of actual coordinated plan or response from the federal government. Switzerland had a coordinated plan put out by their leadership; we have zip.
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Respect the Virus and you should be fine. One thing it has brought out is how materialistic and entitled the US really thinks they are.
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I think the real question we all need to answer is how can we, individually, change our behavior to slow the rate of infection. The virus is unlikely to be eradicated and we will be living with this for a long time. There are small things and bigger things that individuals can do to end the lock down more quickly. If we don't change our behaviour this is only going to happen again, maybe sooner than anyone expects. Do you really want to do this a second time? And we need to change some of our behaviours forever to keep it from happening again in the future.

1) Do not go out for any non-essential items, and really decide what essential means. People in my neighborhood go out for all manner of non-essential items (such as that $6 Starbucks carry-out coffee or a badly needed hair cut.) Essential has a whole new meaning when someone might have to be hospitalized or die because you wanted it.
2) Do not put others at risk. WEAR YOUR MASK. VERY few people cannot wear masks - children under 2 years old, people with severe breathing problems, people who cannot remove the mask without assistance, and some autistic individuals who cannot tolerate the face covering. And it would seem even more important for the rest of us to wear our masks to protect these people. 3) Identify areas of high spread and take steps to stop the spread. For the meat-packing plants, close them until the community spread is under control. Then those workers can go back to work and not worry about their health and their families. For me I've stopped eating meat in order to lessen demand for meat products. Yes, I like meat but not enough to have someone die for me. For buildings with elevators have then=m pre-programmed to stop at every floor so their is no "touch" to push elevator buttons. Small things can help. 4) Keep your distance. Easy to do. Don't crowd, don't push, don't touch. We all were taught to keep our hands to ourselves and to "don't touch" when we were in kindergarten. 5) Be generous. I use Instacart for shopping and tip really, really well because what I tip may be what my shopper uses to buy groceries for their family that day. I do curbside pickup from small businesses to help keep them alive. I try to be generous since I do have some extra money right now.

This is not a temporary situation and parts of our life and culture will change forever. My family will be changed forever. I have children who are essential workers in a hospital and come home every evening to their own personal decontamination situation before they can greet their toddlers. Another child has a small business that has been adversely impacted and the 4 employees are trying very hard to keep the business together. BUT all of them primarily want to keep their families safe. And they need your help.
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ArtistDaughter May 2020
I applaud your somewhat upbeat attitude to do the best you can in all this and to try to help those in greater need than you. I read the problem, though, with thinking that not eating meat lessens the demand, at least in the present, is that the animals have already been grown for our meat and are being shot or poisoned because they can't be sent to the meat packers, so just wasted. Millions of creatures. It is beyond sad. Perhaps eventually the decreased demand will force different ways of growing our meat that won't end in such horrific disasters. Right now I feel helpless to do anything about these sorts of things going on. And as it goes on there are still some making large amounts of money off of our misery. Yes, I am getting a little depressed, which is not my nature.
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I am a nurse
I could say so much on this topic
The media makes everyone absolutely hysterical
For example with respect to masks. The CDC has said for years that masks can actually increase the spread of respiratory illness because people touch their faces more and dont dispose of them properly ect,. Even healthcare workers have lapses and this is why you see them getting infected despite masking gowning and gloves. The CDC has actually done studies on the use of masks and this is why at the beginning of this crisis they advised people not to wear masks in public.
I realize that at first glance people see healthcare workers wearing masks and immediately think; they are wearing them, why shouldn't we? But the reason we wear them is because we are intimately more involved in pt care. We handle their body fluids, dress them, handle their eating and drinking utensils, clean up after them, and we can be in their personal space for long periods of time. We also sometimes give them respiratory treatments which is much more dangerous. And again , as I mentioned even we still manage sometimes to infect ourselves and we have been taught how to handle these things. The media is where I first saw masks being pushed for regular people outdoors. In an effort to try , yet again, to stick it to Trump they spread misinformation and persisted so much that the CDC & Fauci ( who publically said masks were more for mental health then anything) gave up on their studies and guidelines & said ok fine we will recommend masks.

This mask issue has been going on a long time in healthcare. Way before Covid-19 . It began with Flu vaccines. Given a choice 60% of healthcare workers would refuse a flu vaccine. There are many reasons why, but eventually the US government told hospital systems that if they did not have a 90% compliance rate with the flu vaccine they would take 2% of their medicare profits - that is why most hospitals now force healthcare workers to get vaccinated . ( yeah I know MONEY). The reason I know so much about the mask issue is because I refused to get a flu vaccine every year, which meant my employer tried to force me to wear a mask all the time. So I researched masking myself and thats when I discovered the CDC did not recommend them, had done studies on their efficacy, and found they might worsen circumstances and so every year at work I would give my managers a lot of pushback because of it.

My personal experience confirms what the CDC has found- you touch your face more, you have a dirty mask on and touch the mask, and then you touch surfaces and when you are talking about having it on for hours - its easy to forget. Handwashing is VERY effective- social distancing is also VERY effective. Masks I suggest you research on your own- I am not asking anyone to take my word for it.
I also would like to speak about the numbers of dead and dying. Again they are doing with covid-19 what they have done for decades with the flu. They combine the death totals with those who have other chronic illnesses. People with chronic illness such as heart disease, diabetes, and obesity have ALWAYS been at greater risk with ANY respiratory illness. This is exactly the same as it is with flu. It is the same weather you have covid -19, the flu, or the common cold- people with those illnesses are always at greater risk .

With flu they also combine pneumonia deaths with flu so the numbers are inflated. For example lets say you have the common cold and COPD. You develop pneumonia and die. If its flu season they will say you died of the flu, weather or not you actually tested positive for it.

Something else I discovered doing my research on flu- many doctors at the CDC have jobs with BIG PHARMA companies. They also own STOCK in those companies. So when a company makes a medication or vaccine and a doctor at the CDC recommends that medication they make money off of it.
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NYDaughterInLaw May 2020
Thank you for replying, NurseJess! I am not surprised about the CDC - or any government agency for that matter - caving to popular demand. The amount of money that is tied up in keeping people sick is a multibillion dollar industry and the media, ad agencies, politicians, stockbrokers, pharmaceuticals, hospitals, doctors, scientists, pension fund administrators and many more, are all complicit. They all have a vested interest in making more money for themselves. How else do "journalists" and "civil servants" end up with millions in the bank? It's disgusting.
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This is part 2 See my first response below.

Regarding vaccines
The Government passed a law some years ago saying that if a vaccine was produced in good faith ( and they all are) then the pharmaceutical company could not be sued if something was wrong and the vaccine was made using proper techniques.
This is why BIG Pharma is making vaccines for EVERYTHING now. When I grew up there were like 6 vaccines - now there is something like 22.

A note about immunity
As we age vaccines become LESS EFFECTIVE. This information is readily available on the CDC website and yet no one ever reads it. They push flu vaccines on the elderly and yet never tell them the WHOLE truth.

I am not against vaccines- some of them are absolutely life saving- but I do believe that NO information should be kept from the public , including the money incentives and things like the fact that the flu vaccine is only 60% effective .

You are either from the camp that believes everyone is stupid and needs to be told what to do ( a camp which I feel is very patronizing and condescending), or you are like me, and feel that given ALL the information people, are perfectly capable of making decisions which are right for them.
As far as COVID-19 and quarantine. I think politicians are politicizing this virus and trying to force people to choose a party. The FACT is if you feel comfortable going out you should be able to and if you are too afraid you can stay home. No one should be trying to tell anyone what to do. People are smart enough to make their own choices. People who have a higher risk should be staying home, they have been warned. They said Georgia was gonna go up in flames for opening early and Georgia cases continue to go down.
Yesterday I went out to Lowes. This particular Lowes is just outside a 55 snd older community in my state. I was surprised to find many active seniors shopping at Lowes with no face masks on!! They were all zooming round with their carts like BRING IT!!! LOL. A life lived in fear and confinement is called prison. I am in healthcare so I certainly believe in everything the scientists say. But I also have been in medicine for over 30 yrs and I know about every decade or so the scientists who were certain about something 10 yrs ago have to come out and apologize for being wrong. Eggs are evil bad for you cause heart attacks!! OOpsie we were wrong about eggs they are ok! TYLENOL is good for you! NO ones allergic to it KIDS can have it its great stuff!!! OOOpsie Tylenol causes liver failure. Be smart. be safe and look for answers then make a choice best for you!
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cherokeegrrl54 May 2020
Thank you for your very wise words!
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Barb, I hope you test antibody positive and have immunity going forward; it would certainly make your lives easier.

In my opinion NYC got hit so hard and fast by CV because it is a major international business and travel hub. More infected people entered NYC and then came into contact with hundreds of people before we really knew how contagious CV would be. The great Metro system probably contributed to making the spread worse. NYC and NYS are not the only major cities or states who had pandemic plans but had not maintained the stockpiles of supplies their own plans required. Before CV hit, those "missing" stockpiles were not considered a "big deal" by either media or residents. With 20-20 rear view vision, now this is a major failure by all current office holders as society starts playing the blame game. Have our political leaders made bad mistakes handling CV? Yes, they have. But they have also made a lot of good decisions and spending a lot of time on the blame game while we are still under fire seems foolish to me. Acknowledge the mistake, learn from it, and move forward. I can not believe Cuono sent CV positive residents back to LTC because he wanted to kill off elders or even didn't care. I believe he somehow didn't appreciate the impact of his directive would be at the time. He was apparently focused on defending the hospitals, made a mistake and thousands died because of it. We all have to live with the results and maybe we can learn something for the next pandemic. Maybe feeling "burned" by not recognizing the CV risk earlier is one of the reasons Cuono is delaying reopening because he is just so fearful of getting it wrong again.

I also believe as soon as our President was briefed on the possible casualties from CV, he followed every recommendation and did everything in his power to save lives. Everyone was all over Trump for his early travel bands, yet other world leaders followed his example days and weeks later. Without those travel bans, what happened in NYC could have been repeated in every major city with an international airport. Trump and the federal agencies, including the CDC and NIH, have also made mistakes but overall they have accomplished the most important part of the mission. No one in an American hospital has been denied a ventilator because one was not available.

As bad as things are right now, it could have been so much worse and I am thankful for all the things that went right and all the first line workers who made it happen. The media keeps banging on all the things that went wrong and invites us to be angry and depressed, to demonize the leaders who have made obvious mistakes. I chose to focus on all the things that went right and be peaceful and optimistic. I may be very wrong, but at least my days will be brighter until my "wrongness" is proven.
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Isthisrealyreal May 2020
Well said! Bravo!
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What does this bs have to do with care of elderly? Take your rant elsewhere. Every complaint you have is due to the complete incompetence of the "Hoaxer". Other countries are seeing the end of the tunnel, we can't even see the tunnel. Time to vote Trump and all his wealth making buddies out. They really don't care about you, or me.
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Isthisrealyreal May 2020
This is not Trumps doing. You should do some research to discover where and how this all started. It wasn't the Republicans in charge that allowed this screwing with nature atrocity to take place.

You don't have to read a thread, so you don't have to be offended by what someone else needs to vent to keep their sanity on their caregiving journey. Others have valid opinions regardless of what you think.
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