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It take care of my mom and we go to bed around 9 or 10 at night. She used to wake up on her own around 10. Now she sleeps until around 12. I woke her up yesterday at 10 and all day she just wasn’t herself. People are saying to wake her up.


What do I do? Especially lately there will be times when she is wide awake and won’t sleep for like 2 days. Any suggestions would help.

Your profile says that your mom has dementia, and that can be very exhausting for her and her brain, so I am on the "let her sleep" train.
Folks with dementia tend to sleep more and more as their dementia progresses, so ignore the folks that are telling you to wake her up. They haven't a clue as to what they're talking about.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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Just let her sleep. This is what she wants to do at this stage of her life. My father sleeps all the time. He falls asleep frequently during my visits. I just leave him to it.

Your mother has earned the right to sleep whenever she wants and for as long as she wants.

Waking her up is not going to fix her situation.
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Reply to Hothouseflower
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Let her sleep. Dementia causes changes in the sleep cycle because of the changes taking place in the brain. Elderly people sleep more as they get older anyway and have irregular sleep patterns.

People who don't understand the illness will usually give poor advice.

All I can say is just make sure that she gets her meals and daily activities of living when she is awake and feeling up to it. Don't try to force anything if she doesn't feel up to it. If she eats very little, offer smaller meals during her wake time.
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Reply to Scampie1
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Kathy7788 May 23, 2025
I have been encouraging mum to go out but maybe you are right don’t push her if she wants to withdraw at home
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Let her sleep.
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Reply to Bulldog54321
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My mom sleeps 18-20 hours a day. We get her up, in the recliner and she sleep. She sleeps before and after eating and is only active if she has a UTI. This has been going for 4 years.
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Reply to Tandemfun4us
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LucyImHome May 23, 2025
Four years! Wow!!
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How old is your mother?
What is your mother's physical condition and when was the last time you saw the doctor with her?

I would discuss this with the doctor, but if you stay and read on Forum you will also understand that as aging and dementia increase it becomes more and more a matter of less food intake and more (MUCH more) sleeping.

Exercise is crucial to keeping bones strong, balance better, appetite good, tendons stretches, and skin free of pressure sores. So when awake she must be active as she is able to be. But otherwise, there is little reason for her not to be at rest now, until she passes.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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Please let her sleep. Being sleep deprived is so horrible. You would not want someone waking you up if you are sleeping comfortably.
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Reply to Onlychild2024
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After you have ruled out a UTI or other health issue, then let her sleep.
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Reply to NinjaWarrior3
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My mom is going thru the same thing right now and I am always checking to make sure she isn't awake and just waiting for help. She has always been a door locker and very private. The past few days she has been less so and I have seen that she is having difficulty getting in and out of bed easily. I am always conflicted about whether it is better to encourage her to get moving and help her to the bathroom, or let her sleep in. Sleep has been winning more often in these recent days and accidents are not as much an issue now she is wearing night time Depends.
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Reply to SteadyD
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My wife is 69 and has had the same sleep patterns but with bad restless leg and agitation at night. I started giving her melatonin at night with her normal pills and saw a marked change. Sleeping much better, waking up on her own around a normal time. Things have worked well for 6 months, recently though she has started getting restless leg again and starting to sleep a bit later.
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Reply to hamco53
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Starfish2295 May 23, 2025
My husband also has restless legs and I found Magna Life has a cream to apply at bedtime. It works very well for him.
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