Mamma is on her 11th year of living with my husband and me. Since my daddy died, our lives have revolved around mamma. We have moved twice, both times building a house that included a bedroom, living room, and handicapped bathroom just for her.
My mother just entered in-home hospice. I am bathing her, taking her to the toilet, dressing her, etc... I am feeling guilty because I want this to all be over for her (to relieve suffering) and for us (so we can get our life back and spend more time with our kids and grandkids). We are both so utterly exhausted.
I feel so bad because, today, I was looking at the average timelines for preactive and active death, trying to determine when we all might have some relief. My worst fear nowadays is that this situation will drag out.
What is wrong with me?!?!?!