I had another post about my mom losing it and seemingly having another stroke
Luckily we finally got her to the hospital and it turned out to be a blood infection and she's gotten much better. Only she still very weak physically to where we can't take her home yet, even the doctor said if she went home it would be against medical advice.
They want her in a rehab for at least a few weeks to help her get back on her feet and be able to go home but she's totally against it and fighting us at every turn.
Wants to go home, doesn't want to spend Christmas in a rehab, when even considering the idea she simply muttered to herself "I guess my Christmas is going to be ruined."
While I fully support and want her to go to the rehab it's hard knowing that she does have a point, I don't think anyone would want to be away from home/family during the holidays. It's taking its toll on my mental and emotional faculties.
What do people do in this situation? How do you try and reassure their parent and themselves that being stuck in a facility during Christmas is the right thing to do? I almost just want to take her home and risk it, at least if something did happen she'd be going out happy. It's even harder knowing it's a very real possibility that this will be her last Christmas with everything that's happened and how her health has declined.
I know the reality of the situation is she can't go home, we can't even lift her in her current state and she'd just be stuck in her chair/bed unless she magically got better without any medical help.
I've never had to deal with something like this because she's never been sick or had to be anywhere but home during the holidays, and I really don't know what to tell her, if anything, that can make the situation better.
As for the holidays, bring Christmas to Mom. When my Mom was in long-term-care, her first Christmas away from home, I decorated her space, keeping it simple. And would bring in Christmas cards to pin to her bulletin board. Mom has serious dementia, so I didn't know if she understood any of this. I hope she did
Best of luck!!
The ironic thing I'm experiencing is that in the past before her stroke, Mom would remind us "Christmas is just another day".
So, she's getting more "Christmas" this year than she ever imagined. And, I'm thinking it's just another day of Mom struggling to survive in the nursing home.
At this point she needs to understand there is just no way she can be taken out of rehab.
Is it possible that while she is in rehab she could go home for a visit of a few hours then go back? This would give her time with family yet a safe place to return to so she can complete her rehabilitation. As long as it would be safe for her to visit I doubt they would have a problem with that.
As far as her wanting to go home and not to rehab....here comes a possible "therapeutic fib" if the doctor says if she goes home it would be "Against medical advice".. Tell her the insurance company will not pay for the hospital bill if she leaves "against medical advice" so she(the family) would be stuck paying the entire hospital bill. I am sure she like many people are watching their $$ and if the idea of having to pay a huge bill might make me go along with the doctors advice and go to rehab. And it would be much easier to go along with the idea if there was the possibility that I could go home for a visit on Christmas.
The visit is only.... repeat that ONLY if it is safe for her to do so.
Phar