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faithfulbeauty Asked May 30, 2023
How does everyone deal with guilt if you have to suggest assisted living or in-home care for an elderly parent?
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Santalynn Jun 20, 2023
YOU are part of your 'dad's family', and they have no right to judge anything you do. If they object to your best solution for your dad's care they can step up themselves. You frame it to them and to your dad that in-home care/placement is For His Benefit because you want the Best care by folks trained for that work. You continue to contribute/do whatever does work for you and let others, even if it involves the state aging council. You may feel 'guilt' because those years of living in a dysfunctional/stressful/abusive household 'trained' you to feel badly; resist that old conditioning, throw it off, do what works for him and for yourself. You do not have to be a martyr. Loving/honoring a parent is making sure they are safe and in good hands, a humane thing we all deserve.
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lkdrymom Jun 21, 2023
I haven't read all the answers here but I have to say I don't understand why you have any guilt for trying to find the best care for your parent. More times than not the children are NOT the best care. Do you have training in the care of the elderly and can you afford to stop working? If either answer is no they you are not the best option. So why the guilt?
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