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They have washed their hands of any other hands on 'help' unless you beg them. My other family have abandoned my mom and me for the most part, sighting they don't want to get in the middle ______fill in the blank.


Unless it's something funny and light, forget it.


There is no talking things out with said members of family (moms sister) with all of us in the same room, coming to any sort of agreement. Every thing is said behind each other's back and general is is gossipy and laughed off.


If I do happen to get any help with anything and it just involves me then my mom started inserting that wedge and smearing me as heavy as she can. It gets laughed off or convo cut off. They can't deal with the toxicity either, how do they expect me to Oh, the answer to that is out of sight out of mind. If something comes up, throw some money at it and all will work out.


Have I been used by them all? I think I am ready to get off my pity party and get back to work and take back my life. I'm very frustrated but change is needed!!

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It sounds as though the rest of the family has realized that your mom is mentally ill.

Do you have plans to leave?
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Rbuser1 Jul 2019
She lives with me. The light at the end of the proverbial tunnel is that she might be going back to her apartment in a few months. That is the plan.
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For myself I would be moving on. I couldn't think of a single reason to stay, and certainly not the accidental circumstance that related me to everyone by blood. But that's me. As to having any answer to what to do about "them" I do not; that's why I would have to move on.
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When people give or loan you money, as you said they have, they think they have power over you. It may be intentional or not, but when you get financial help, it leaves you open to be at the mercy of the people you got it from, even if you didn't exactly use the money to get a pedicure or buy yourself some new clothes.

Start planning your escape now. Don’t run off in a huff and burn your bridges. Get a job and save your money, ALL of it, for a place of your own. When you go, don't make accusations and engage in arguments. You’re leaving and that’s it. What happens after that is up to them.
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