My mom has a dog and she is putting the dog in danger and herself but refuses to give the dog up. She is feeding food he cannot eat that is cauing allergies and bathing him at all hour of the night falling and not saying anything leaving the dog in the bathtub and sometime put him outside and forget he is out there. We must find a way to take the dog away before she or the dog gets hurt really bad.
When my mother eventually went into a nursing home I bought a tiny house on 2 acres out in the country. Sue and Pixie now live with me, along with my 3 cats and an old black lab who came from rescue last year. She can't sit up or stand any more but I took my handyman along to lift her into the truck and brought her here to watch the dogs playing in the backyard. She's content in the knowledge that her beloved pets are safe and well cared for.
With all the chaos and stress over the past few years I don't know what I'd have done without my furkids. Frankly I prefer them to most humans :)
Even so, for others who may be reading this question for an answer, I'm just going to say that, as much as animals are good for the health of an elder, the decision to keep or rehome a pet cannot ever be left in the hands of a dementia patient. While these beloved pets should not be ripped away from them in anger or with attempted logic, they can just be quietly and undramatically removed with a simple explanation of "went to heaven", "very sick and had to be put to sleep" or "ran away and we're looking for him". The one I used most often was "not feeling well and had to leave him at the vet", then is a question arises, "still at the vet" or "they don't know what's wrong yet" and continue that answer until the questions stop. With dementia, they will. And there is no sense of time, so answering in this way is the dementia equivalent of just letting it go.
BTW - would you consider updating your profile which says your mom is in independent living with general age-related decline, sense now you say she is living with your niece and has dementia. Mant of us go first to review the profile when a question is posed by someone we don't recognize.
For me, knowing how much my Mom loves her pets and always cared for them, these pets also became part of my family...I have my own pets and had to integrate them into our daily routine. Mom's safety is obviously the priority, but integrating the pets into your family can be done with a little patience and effort...And for me, if you love your parent or person for whom you are providing care, you will love and respect them enough to know they would not want you to dump or abandon their pet simply to get the pet out of the, and I pray to God neither would you....
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