How do YOU “take care of yourself” while in the roll of caregiver?

Please continue to see a therapist. Look into meds for your dad for his emotions. My mom is taking Seroquel and I see a big difference in her behavior.

Of course, you want to be there for your dad. You are equally as important. Do make time to see your friends. Take walks if you don't feel like hitting the gym or even just window shop at the mall.

I suppose that everyone handles exhaustion and stress differently. I do the opposite. If I am stressed or exhausted, I don't eat. I know that isn't healthy but I lose my appetite.

I hope you will find ways to relax and enjoy some time for yourself. One thing that I enjoy is listening to music. Take a walk while listening to music on your phone.

I also like to make jewelry or sew. Don't do giant projects. Even just an hour doing something enjoyable is a break.

Best wishes to you and your dad.

It sounds like you(when you say that you lack energy to do pretty much anything) and your dad don't have your depression under control. There are so many different medications to help with that, that it might be time to talk to both your Dr's to see about increasing the dose, adding another to the existing or changing them all together. And perhaps going back to see a counselor or therapist might be in order for you as well. Life is too short to live it in misery. There is much joy to be found, but when depression is in the way, it's hard to find it.

I was a caregiver for my husband for many, many years in our home, and it was very hard and exhausting. I had to learn the hard way that I was just as important to take care of as he was. I joined a local caregiver support group, which used to meet in person before Covid, and now meets on Zoom, and that was a life saver for sure. I also made time with my friends to go shopping, out for lunch or supper, took walks around my neighborhood, went to church, or just sat outside on my patio with a glass a wine to enjoy the scenery. I made sure that I had "me" time, and that was so very helpful in reenergizing me so I could continue on my journey with my husband. It doesn't have to be anything big, but it has to be something.

My husband is gone now, just like your dad will be gone some day, so please try and make the best of your visits, and look for the positive, as there will come a day when you will wish that you had just one more day with him. God bless you.

My first thought is if your dad is taking a med to help with his depression and anger. Zoloft was a huge help to my dad. Getting your dad treatment for this may help. And you’re right, it’s easy to get down after these visits. More than a few times I’d eat junk food after being with my parents, I loved them and wanted to be involved in their care, but it also seemed overwhelming and just sad a lot of the time. You know the answers, you typed them out, now find out why you can’t act on them, a good question for your counselor. Is your medical evaluation up to date? I had to force some changes, walking daily, eating better—specifically, with few exceptions I no longer eat after 6pm until the next day, a big help getting focused on things other than food, and spending time only with people who are positive and encouraging, Life truly is short, I hope you find a new pattern and enjoy it