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My sister currently is in assisted living. We knew she couldn’t live on her own after numerous hospital stays, and recommendations from hospital social workers. She has been in the ALF for 2 years, fighting, gnawing and cursing to get “out”. Now she has to be reminded to bathe, feed and walk her dog, and get out to socialize. She was always outgoing, social and entertaining. Now she sits and has conversations with her family and friends who are no longer with us. Selfishly we see it as a break as we are not dealing with the calls from the ALF . But is there a time when you know it is time to move to memory care?

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If she is not bathing on her own then her care part of the contract needs to be amended and bathing added which will mean higher level of care and more money.

The dog will need to be taken away especially if transferred to MC. ALs allow animals but the resident or family needs to care for them. Aides are not responsible for the care. They shouldn't even have to remind her to walk it.
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Get the dog out of there. There is no need for him/her to suffer because sister is not all there.
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does the AL where she currently live have Memory Care in the same building?
If so the transition will be much easier for her.
I would have a meeting with the director of the AL AND the MC and discuss option how the transition can be made easier for her.
Since he does now have outbursts it might be time for her to see the doctor as well for any medication adjustments that need to be made. It is possible that the MC will want her stabilized before she becomes a resident there.
Also make sure that the MC will permit the dog. Most if not all MC are locked units and she would have to be accompanied to walk the dog. (even though MC most likely has an outdoor area it is probably not designated as a "dog walk area")
You say you are not "dealing with the calls from the ALF" what are the calls? and are they saying that it is time to move her? Or are you just letting them go to voicemail and not returning calls? If they are calling saying that she should be moved then you know it is time that she be transitioned to MC.
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If you think it isn’t quite time now, it will be soon. Start making the plans – check out facilities, find what furniture she can take and what will have to be removed, what the fees are and the financial plans that are needed (eg applying for Medicaid, or at least getting the paperwork details ready). Waiting for a crisis cuts off a lot of options, knowing what needs to happen is a really good idea.
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Malanna Sep 2021
Thank you for your input. I am grateful for your help.
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It's time. The AL people will tell you pretty soon anyway, but it doesn't require them to tell you for you to make the move.

MC is such a better situation all around, and she may well thrive there with the activities that are geared toward memory patients.
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