How do you handle questions and worries when the person is still "together" enough to know there's a problem with their mind?

Hi jmacleve,
It sounds like he is where he needs to be medication wise. Seroquel is what they put my mom on so that is already covered. Being bipolar is definitely an extra thing to deal with. And I do understand the coming and going.....some days my mom seems to be on track and then the next not so much. She also has Parkinson’s to deal with so she is not mobile on her own.
Is there a senior center in your area? They can be very helpful with resources and such. Pepsee is right about laughter....we try to keep things light and watch lots of comedies! That and lots of reassurance when she is worried about what is going to happen in the future. Make sure you take care of yourself too as that is very important!

PS, it's nice to see your pretty face. I feel like I know who I'm talking to. 😊

Jm,
Don't even worry too far in advance. Stay in the day and enjoy him as much as possible while you still can. The Klonopin is one of the benzos people on here were suggesting.💕🌹

i should have explained. Tom is bipolar. He is 64. He is already on lithium (has been since he was in his early 20s), seroquel (about 20 years or so) and they added klonopin which has been a lifesaver because it seems to have taken the edge off his mania. He still has hallucinations, but since his bipolar meds are working -- and that's a big 'because' -- I'm not seeing adding a new med as a good idea. He's also on four other meds for medical conditions.

As things are right now, my only regret is that I have to work. Our joke is that I need to win the lottery so I can stay home. He's still together enough now that he can get up during the day and get his meals and he reads and waits for me to come home. I realize that things may change, but when he gets worse (unless that doesn't happen until I'm on SSA) I don't know what we'll do.

Hi,
I am dealing with the same situation with my mom. She was diagnosed with Lewy Body in 2016. She knew something was wrong but did not understand why it could not be fixed. We took her to a psychiatrist who diagnosed her with LB. He started her on a benzo drug at a very low dose and it helped her tremendously. It took care of her anxiety and most of her hallucinations. It does not work for everybody but we saw a big improvement. Now when she asks about what she has we just tell her that her brain does not function like it used to and she seems satisfied with that. Your husband is fortunate to have you.....I hope you have help as you go through this trying time. Let us know how things are going.

Hi,
What a sad, scary situation for you and hubby. My heart goes out to you both.💕

My Mom has short term memory loss. We aren't sure what disease it is related to yet. All symptoms are consistent with Parkinson's.

I know these are horrible illnesses, but in my house we just laugh. Yep, we tease and joke about it. Really, it's that or constantly cry. Even when I forget something, I say * I am your daughter.* She cracks up. But we've always been Goofy and silly.

I'm not saying do what we do, I'm sure hubby is not in the mood. However, maybe put on some classic comedy's, cuddle on the sofa together and try to be as " normal" as possible. Carol Burnett, Honeymooners, Jerry Lewis....whatever his humor is....go there.

I don't know if this helps but it's worth a try.
Good luck, please come back and let us know how it's going🌷

People on this forum who care for Loved Ones who have dementia diseases talk about using distraction, too. When LO's get upset and cry, try to redirect their thoughts to something pleasant, something they like, make them a snack, put on a tv show, etc. But... I think benzodiazepine-type medications have a place in treating those who are on a one-way course with increasing confusion and dementia. It's a merciful thing to relieve someone's anxiety over something they cannot control.

Jmacleve, in this particular situation, since there is not an option for recovery and this disease will progress, why not put the focus on making hubs as comfortable as possible. I'm thinking that he could get a low-dose prescription for an anti depressant or a benzodiazepine to relieve anxiety. There is good reason he will be depressed and anxious at times, but there is nothing that can be done... other than to soothe him and help him during this time of transition, right?

Also, I think hugs and reassuring words are great, too! You did the right thing, what you could do, to help him.

I am sorry you are going through this and sorry about your husband. I can't answer that question as I am relatively new and I wonder the same thing with my mil, but I am sure that someone much more qualified will be able to offer wonderful advice.