I have been taking care of my mother-in-law for 3 very long years. She is spiteful, narcissistic and passive-aggresive towards me. She has no mental illness and can move well with the aid of a walker. However, she will lie in her bed all day and expect me to do every for her - from carrying her food to wiping her backside to changing her tv's channels - literally. I can't and won't do it anymore! When she was deathly ill (the hospital kicked her out after a week because she refused to take her meds and would pull out her drips) it was understandable and I didn't mind, but she has been well for 2 years now yet she still expects it.
I wasn't given a choice to care for her. It was placed on my shoulders as the wife of her oldest son (the 2nd eldest child). We had to move into her house because she refused to leave and it was shortly after her youngest child's death. I have never felt at home here and most of our things are still boxed up in an outside room - also not by choice. She has also tried to cause trouble between my husband and myself numerous times, but thankfully he now sees through that.
My husband was diagnosed with PTSD this year and my son has Bi-Polar disorder. On top of all this I have to try and raise my two younger children in this negative environment and support my eldest in university. I have no help around the house or with her care (she has 2 daughters) and have lost connection with my friends and church because of taking care of her.
Lately I cringe at the sound of her voice and can't stand to look at her.
Between my mother-in-law, my husband and son's disorders and an isolated life I feel lost. I can't cope with even doing mundane tasks like washing dishes anymore. Most days I just want to be "away".
Sorry for the essay. I guess I ranted and rambled.