Mom is very proud of being able to get around on her own. Driving around a small town is fine, but having her drive on the highway scares me. I've told her this, but how should I handle it if she does it anyway?
Midkid58, that's where we are now. Mom has promised to stay off highways, but she keeps asking if she can't drive on them "just one more time" (I suspect there will always be "just one more time"). I hope she'll honor her promise, as your mother did. If not, I'm not sure what we'll have to do.
When mother's driving became more erratic and she'd dinged up all 4 fenders on her little car--we simply extracted a promise from her that she'd no longer get on any roads that were "high speed"--freeways, highways.....she was good to her word. She has ONE friend who can drive, and it is horrifying to see this woman in action. She routinely takes long drives, but mother is not allowed to go with her.
Mother was compliant in this--she was actually always a little scared of freeways, and her world had gotten very small. She never gadded about--I doubt she put 100 miles on her car in a week.
Try just getting mom to agree to limits on her driving. My KIDS weren't allowed to freeway drive until they'd shown us they were good to go---it's not really any different with elderly folks.
Mother no longer drives, and yes, while that's relieving, somebody(s) has to take her all her places.
Search this site for loads of info on elders driving and how to end it.
And keep in mind when her driving ends there has to be some way to get her around, docs, shopping etc. Elders can turn kids into full time chauffeurs. Not fun.
Unless she is deemed medically unfit to drive, there isn't anything you can do to MAKE her not drive on the highway. If you truly believe she is a danger to herself and others, then you could discuss with her doctor and start the process of getting her license revoked entirely.
If her doctor deems her a safe driver, all you can do is accept that she will be taking the occasional highway trip. Find a way for it to bother you less; if you can't do anything to change the situation, stressing over it will only work against you.
Mother was compliant in this--she was actually always a little scared of freeways, and her world had gotten very small. She never gadded about--I doubt she put 100 miles on her car in a week.
Try just getting mom to agree to limits on her driving. My KIDS weren't allowed to freeway drive until they'd shown us they were good to go---it's not really any different with elderly folks.
Mother no longer drives, and yes, while that's relieving, somebody(s) has to take her all her places.
Search this site for loads of info on elders driving and how to end it.
And keep in mind when her driving ends there has to be some way to get her around, docs, shopping etc. Elders can turn kids into full time chauffeurs. Not fun.
If her doctor deems her a safe driver, all you can do is accept that she will be taking the occasional highway trip. Find a way for it to bother you less; if you can't do anything to change the situation, stressing over it will only work against you.