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Have any of you dealt with a spouse getting a CPAP that impacts your own health? It is loud, makes irregular and intermittent sounds and he doesn’t seem able to adjust it. It keeps me from falling asleep, wakes me up and then I get really tense when I can’t tune out the disturbance. I’ve recorded the sounds but Kaiser has offered no help. He got a new headset but it didn’t help. I started gaining weight and getting cranky from loss of sleep! Right now I sleep on the couch (which is actually more comfortable than the bed so that’s a bonus and I feel so much better with more sleep!). But I’m wondering if any of you have any other coping strategies that worked for you in the longer term? Thank you!

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My grandmother decided putting a pillow over her hubbys head to keep his CPAP from disturbing her sleep wasn’t a good thing so she moved into the next bedroom with a full bed. That lady is not a nice lady without proper sleep.

hubby and I don’t need cpap but we do have sleep issues so we sleep in separate rooms to keep healthy. Sometimes we take naps together to keep that human touch bonding cuddling alive.
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janeinspain Jan 2023
Haha and thank you Tagtae, the naps together sounds sweet! I am also not nice without proper sleep!
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I am so sorry that you are struggling with this. I don’t have an answer but I will be following your post because my brother has issues with his CPAP. He has very serious heart problems.
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No personal experience with this but my happily married cousin and her husband sleep in separate bedrooms for this very reason.

Now that I think of it, I’ve also heard about snoring necessitating separate bedrooms in at least two other cases over the years. (One friend told me she can sleep through the freight trains running on the tracks near their house, but not her husband’s snoring!) People need their sleep! 😴
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I wondered why my Grandparents had separate rooms. "He snores" was the answer.

Now I get it. I LOVED being in Covid iso on my own.

So longer term, my 2nd preference would be to start looking at what other room in my house could become my beautiful, serene, feminine boudoir. (Maybe have date nights occasionally 😜)

My 1st preferred choice would be to build a shed & the snorer/CPAP user would sleep out there. Way back out there..

I have zero empathy if my sleep is destroyed.
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Tagtae Jan 2023
That’s what I did I made my room my feminine boudoir. Pink and white mostly. Girly everything. Lol and crystals in the window for the rainbows!
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You have so much stress already from your caregiving situation with your parents!

Is there another room you can sleep in?

You NEED your sleep. You MUST HAVE your sleep. Does your H complain if you sleep on the couch? Has he listened to your audio playback of the machine?
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janeinspain Jan 2023
Right?! And I haven't even posted about all THAT in a long while. Yes there is another room but I actually like the couch better for now! And no he doesn't really complain. He has listened to the recordings but doesn't seem capable of making any adjustments that solve the problem. Maybe he moves around too much and creates leakage - when the thing started blowing air on me, on top of all the noise, I was DONE.
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Separate bedrooms… hope you can set that up..
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Mine is a ResMed Airsense and makes almost no sound. It was not cheap, but it has been totally worth it. My husband says he doesn't hear it, which is true since I hear him snoring.

Does your Hub's healthcare network have a Sleep Clinic? If so he needs to go there to get the air pressure adjusted properly and maybe try a different mask/headgear. There's no reason for his unit to keep you awake.
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janeinspain Jan 2023
He has a ResMed Airsense 10. And he has spent a night at the medical office for a sleep study. He hasn't taken it in but has had a phone consult about the noise and they sent him new headgear. Didn't help.
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janeinspain, I agree with the other writers about separate bedrooms. Hubby and I have had that arrangement for many years. I snore like a freight train, and he has restless legs thus will kick numerous times during the night. He likes to watch sports until he falls asleep and I like to watch something different. Neither of us can sleep without the TV first being on, it helps our brains to focus on something else. The cats like this arrangement, too.

Plus, I have seen from TV commercials about a FDA approved implant that your hubby can get to help with his condition. https://www.inspiresleep.com
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Tagtae Jan 2023
I hate the restless leg thing. I have that and it’s the major reason I can’t get to sleep. I take meds for it.
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I worked in sleep medicine for a number of years. Cpap machines should not be making those kinds of noises, it sounds defective. It should make a steady, low volume, computer like sound.

There may be some noise from the exhaled air coming from the mask vents as well, but nothing even approaching the magnitude you are describing.

What kind of machine and mask does he use? I may be able to ask some former co workers if they have any ideas.
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janeinspain Jan 2023
Thanks Zippy, it's a ResMed AirSense10. I don't know what type of mask - they changed that recently so that it attaches to the headgear on the top of his head, I guess so it doesn't tangle as easily when he turns back and forth. But it didn't help. And he doesn't seem to hear it at all so he will be sleeping fine and not realize it needs some adjustment. The dang thing will be blowing cold air in my face and he's oblivious. ;/
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there was a recall on certain Philips cpap machines
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Separate Bedrooms, no need to suffer.
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janeinspain Jan 2023
Thanks! Between the very comfortable couch and our spare bedroom I think I will survive this :)
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I always wondered about those machines. My husband only snores on his back and twitches too. So he gets pushed over to his side. I had a co-worker who slept in a separate room as her husband because she snored.

I agree with Zippy, it should not be disturbing the person u sleep with. I was in the hospital with Mom one time and had to ask the nurse to turn down the vitals monitor. That beep was driving me crazy like chinese water torture. 😊
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Tagtae Jan 2023
I forgot the twitching. I feels like a bug bit me. Doctors refuses to understand.
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Jane, we have Kaiser too. Dh just got the brand new CPAP machine that is totally silent, no sound comes from it at all. Your dh has a defective unit. Make a stink, which is sometimes required w Kaiser. 🙄 Exaggerate the situation if necessary and also tell the boneheads your friend who has Kaiser just got a brand new unit just released which is silent, etc.

In the meantime, move into the spare bedroom which I hope you have one of. You'll never want to move back into the master again. Trust me on that. Once you get away from the twitching, the restlessness, the midnight pee runs, the dopey tv choices, crunching of chosen snacks, scratching of body parts, farting and all the rest of the b.s., you'll think you've died and gone to heaven for the blessed peace, regardless of noise or no noise emanating from CPAP machines which emanate bad odors, imo.

🤣😂😁
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janeinspain Jan 2023
Thank you lealonnie, agree you sometimes have to be a very squeaky wheel at Kaiser. And I do trust you on this point about separate sleeping. I realized this morning that not only do I have better sleep I am also not fighting for covers which he was always rolling over with and leaving me exposed. He didn't learn the art of turning without clutching the comforter. So at this point I will take refuge where I can to enjoy the most comfortable couch ever and some blessed peace!
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Just saw your update Jane. It definitely sounds like the machine is defective, Resmed is a good brand, so I doubt it's a problem with the overall line of machines, just something wrong with your husband's specific one. I'd honestly be worried he's not getting the proper therapy if the machine itself is defective. Untreated Sleep Apnea can have some nasty repercussions.
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I have a CPAP and it literally makes no noise unless something isn't right with it. Have it rechecked.
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You say you feel it blowing on you. Is it because the turns so much that the mask falls off? The fact that the headgear was changed points in that separately. With the added RLS, he might need to keep working with his specialist.
I do know of my neighbors who sleep separatly. Has he tried to sleep in a recliner?
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Take your own bedroom and give yourself a break!

Get rid of the mask and try, NOMASK.COM
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