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Hi Yikes
Welcome to the forum.

Can you share what your in laws health issues are?

Since you are having to encourage them to follow the doctors medical advice, do you think they have dementia, a difference of opinion or just exercising their rights to live as they choose?
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I have been incredibly lucky as my in-laws are wonderful and I truly love helping them as they transition into this next stage of life. My in-laws live in their own home and are getting forgetful, hesitate to say definite dementia. My mil is 90, has heart valve issues and is on palliative hospice as she requires almost continual O2. Hospice nurse checks in once a week and oversees medications related to her heart condition. She also has had both hips replaced over 20 years ago and suffers back pain and bursitis. Each week I fill her AM/PM pill minder. Each morning there are 6 pills she must take, the most important being her blood pressure medication. Most days she remembers her morning medications but has been inconsistent with her pm medication. I call twice a day to remind them to take their meds even on the days I spend with them. My fil (age 94) cannot ever remember to take his meds and relies on my mil to give him his. He has a history of stroke and has had a heart attack. This past June 2018 he had a pacemaker/defibrillator implanted. He’s also had an issue with his prostate and needed a surgical procedure in October and has just recently recovered from bronchitis. None of his children live in state so I stepped in to help him during his recovery from the first surgery. As my mil can no longer drive or take care of his changing health issues the job fell to me. However I now take them BOTH to all doctor appointments (there are many) monitor all medications and changes. I now oversee many things in their household. I’m trying to get help from other family members but . . . We are very close and it’s hard for them to accept help from others. But if anyone has any new tricks or tips on how I could get them to follow doctors orders, take meds as directed, drink more water, eat less salt I would truly appreciate it. Truthfully I’m starting to get a bit overwhelmed trying to assist my in-laws and take care of my own family. Thanks for listening
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Thanks for the additional details.
Some on this forum speak of pill boxes that have an alarm that gives a reminder as to when to take the pills. I’ve never tried them.
I try to get my aunts pills all okayed for mornings. She takes some extended release types. She has an aide that comes in the morning to help her with her ADLs (activities of Daily Living). She was forgetting to take her pills and then would tell me she had taken them when she really hadn’t. Every once in awhile she has an evening pill and I do a lot of calling to get that taken. I also have cameras so that helps. I can see if she is actually taking it.

Water is a challenge for all elders. My mom would fill glasses and line them up on her kitchen counter. She would work on them during the day. My aunt used the small disposable bottles. The aide counts how many empties there are the next day. Usually only one or two but she eats a lot of soup and has several glasses in the morning while the aide is there. She is also a big fruit eater. Her blood test are good and don’t show dehydration, so I have to be satisfied with that.

Salt is tough. The best thing is don’t bring salt into the house. No processed foods. No chips. Read all labels. No canned foods unless they are sodium free. No fast foods. My mom couldn’t have salt. It was a challenge. Although she was extremely compliant. It’s just difficult to police everything that comes in. You also have to let well meaning friends and family know not to sabatoge their diets by bringing salty treats.
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